Monday, September 24, 2007

D-Tails and D-Construction of D-Tour Launch...

Friday night found me catching the last few songs of Carjack's set. Beginning to like him more and more. As a wise man once said, you can't have Detroit without a good carjack. There was a brief moment where his backing track was a spot-on replica of Suicide's drum machine sound. I first had that feeling when some DJ in Europe played Dead Combo's "You Don't Look So Good" (an overlooked classic if there ever was) and you think it'd happen a lot more. But it doesn't. Good for us. Check out CJ's cd-r/demo/whatever and dig on the total Kraftwerk instrumental of "Carbot's Departure"...beautifully sparse and pastoral in an unexpected yet totally welcome change of pace or "departure." Get it?

The Terrible Twos wreaked havoc after that. I can safely say that the Garden Bowl lounge has, pound for pound, hosted an overwhelming majority of my favorite shows in this town. Greenhornes on Superbowl Sunday '99 (2 sets), Soledad Brothers where Swank handed me the drumstix, Clone Defects a billion times, John Gillis solo '01, a rare Patrick Keeler-Tim Vulgar-Jack White jam session from some long-forgotten date in 2001 as well as my first-ever vocal performance, while on drums, doing "Stormy" by the Jesters of Newport.

So the Twos were on and the freaks came out. Within the first thirty seconds of the first song the overzealous security goon had kicked out Colin of the Frustrations for punk shit...you know, pogoing, slamming, whatever it is the kids are calling it these days. More than a few people were awkwardly hoisted over-head in an almost stationary crowd surf precariously trying to avoid the ever-present ceiling fan. This is the way and place that I like to see shows.

And apparently the owners have taken note. I've been told the Garden Bowl will start having more consistent free shows in their lounge. It's more likely to be shows that would usually be upstairs at the Stick and draw 50 people. So instead of constantly reliving that miserable prospect, bands will get paid a flat fee, people will get in for free, the club will rely on bigger bar receipts and in the end EVERYONE enjoys the evening so much more.

The Go did their thing upstairs at the Stick. I kinda prefer when Bobby's just singing. His guitar playing is nothing bad, but the guitar itself is so unpowerful and forgettable. I can't help but worry that the rest of the world will never truly understand or appreciate the genius of these guys. I truly hope they discover their place, because the world needs more bands with their skill and determination. Seeing them in bigger spaces leads me to wonder whether their better-suited as a 5-piece. However, when the crash into "Meet Me at the Movies" no one seems to care and for a brief moment it's as if everything is perfect.

While my personal coney preference is clearly Duly's in Southwest Detroit, my after-show go-to is always American Coney Island. Forget that Mack Rice supposedly wrote "Mustang Sally" at Lafayette. Forget that Lafayette is supposedly where Fred and Patti Smith met. There's no feeling in that place. Too often an old restaurant or club or hotel is trumpeted for the fact that it hasn't changed, that it's been the same since the Thirties or whatever. Half the time that's a good thing. But on Lafayette, I call bullshit. It is uncomfortable, small and sub-par. And the place doesn't even stay open 24 hours! It's no contest. I prefer the sophistication that comes with American's Flatiron-esque vista of two avenues meeting at a V. I can get past the gaudy sports-bar decoration of the place and long for the time when a place naming itself "American" was a sign of pride. Disagree? Bring it on in the comments.

Saturday started at the CAID and the pushed-back scheduling left me having to endure the last half of the Nice Device. How do you type the sound a yawn makes? They sound like bland, sanitized 89x modern rock. Which is good for them, because that has to be what they're going for, as there's no way such mediocrity can be confused for anything else. Didn't the singer used to be in some Indigo Girls folk act?

Following that lameness was the long-awaited return of SSM. I was really slow to warm to this band when they started up two years ago. My initial sentiment was that I'd rather see each one of the band members in their previous/other band....John in the Hentchmen, Marty with the Cyril Lords and Shettler in the classic Sights three-piece line-up. I passed up a chance to put out a 7" by them because I just wasn't "feeling it." That was my loss.

With time, their self-titled album has grown on me like ivy at Wrigley Field. The first three songs (which were the proposed 7" tunes) are flawless and the memorable moments do not stop there. The craft behind songs like "Dinosaur" and "2012" as well as "Sick" is phenomenal and the whole thing is easily one of the best full-lengths to emerge from Detroit in the past 10 years.

Their performance was solid. All the old songs held their weight. Was glad to see Shettler without the drum machine, but then thought that the newer songs sounded a bit thin in the rhythm department. I'm also a fan of them without the light show. Focus on the tunes and the crowd will focus on you. Dare I say I'm excited to hear what their upcoming full-length has to offer.

Walked in halfway through the Mahonies' Garden Bowl set. I'd first been hipped to these guys last year when word on the street was that they'd be doing an impromptu guerrilla gig through an unguarded power supply at Tastefest. Some douche told me the wrong time and I missed it. So this would be my first time seeing the Mahonies and it was perfection. I'd missed the band-sponsored coney eating contest (won by Hunter Muldoon with a respectable four coney dogs downed) but was otherwise wowed with their otherworldly absurdly dumb genius. Like the Ramones, the Stooges, the Sneaky Pinks before them...you either get it instantly or are perpetually confused. And a song written about Clone Defects bassist Chuck Fogg? Unreal! I must've had 4 different people come up to tell me the Mahonies were their new favorite band. And I'm in agreement with them. I got to get them on Cass...it should be possible to fit 8 songs on one side of a 45.

Freer upstairs was horrid. Someone mentioned to me that they'd seen lots of bands lately with a piano-playing lead singer. Interested and thinking they'd meant local bands, I inquired "Really?" to which they replied, "Yeah. Coldplay, Keane..." And that's the unfavorable company I would lump Freer in with. And in a lot of ways, I love this.

I love the fact that I've been hearing about this band for God-knows how long and keep making that mental note that I still need to check them out. Even if what I've read about them has failed to intrigue me or spark my interest, I still gotta know what's up, in my own opinion, on my own terms, for my own sake. So to finally see this band and be able to say in my own voice that they are shitty...nothing beats that. Still on the to-see-if-they're-shitty list: Johnny Headband, Bang Bang, Ghost City and a ton of other shit that is most-likely shitty.

The unexpected (unexplained?) return of Ko and the Knockouts drew a sizable crowd at the Stick. The Decks crew were up front in full-effect and singing and dancing like the lovable fools they are. Eddie Baranek is surprisingly captivating onstage when he's not drunk off his ass. Ko was a little spotty at first, but eventually found her footing.

Good heckles heard were: as Ko said "This many people didn't like us when we were really a band..." to which some smartass replied "We still don't!" and when Baranek introduced a song as being "written in my US History after 1945 class" a razor-witted one remarked "Get your degree!" And that is my new favorite band taunt. Get a degree. Don't hesitate to use it. Steve Nawara joined for the last few songs and they ended with "Black and Blue" their best-known song as featured on the Sympathetic Sounds of Detroit compilation that no one ever got paid for.

Downstairs immediately afterwards were the Frustrations. While the crowd reaction was tepid (most likely in response to the same overzealous security guard from the previous night in attendance) it did not keep this collection of weirdos from destroying. When they cruised into "Exploding Mind" I moved more than I would all weekend. Dancy? Calypso? Is Dunkerly finally listening to some Fire*Eater drumming? Either way, shit was tits.

Random unsolicited Matt Smith comment:
"It's like (GI) meets Band of Gypsies"

And allow me a brief aside on the topic of unsolicited Matt Smith comments. Matt is always coming up with these zany pairings of bands to try and describe something. I think the first one I ever was privy to was him comparing the Buzzards to Motorhead and the Velvet Underground, and I'm sure they were doing something like having a tea party in Valhalla or some bullshit. The thing is, whenever Matt makes these distinctions, while he may be somewhat close to describing the sound, he just sounds so asinine that I can't help and discredit EVERYTHING he says afterwards. He's so immersed in obscure records and recordings to notice the obvious and likely comparisons for bands. And, for some reason, this really irritates me.

Anyway, to end their set, Colin from the Frustrations climbs on a chair and smacks his guitar down on a cocktail table. He breaks a few bottles, nothing crazy, but nevertheless a good ending exclamation point for the show that would ultimately end in utter mayhem.

The previously-mentioned overzealous security guard took this as an affront and overreacted. He was closely followed by an heretofore unmentioned security guard (it's worth mentioning both of these guys are pretty damned new to the job). One of them goes after Colin and the other grabs his guitar. Big no-no. Don't ever touch anyone else's guitar even when they let you. Let alone some burly dude who's probably never held one before and is likely to break the instrument that Colin built himself.

Chris Campbell of the Terrible Twos (essentially big brother to the Frustrations guys) calmly tries to grab the guitar back and this other security guard flies off the handle. He grabs Chris, starts unnecessarily pushing him out the door where Chris is clearly willing to do so of his own volition. I got in the guy's face for a second and said "You need to chill out" and was fucking scared to shit. He had the crazy-eyed stare and I backed off. While still being pushed out the door Chris spit in his face and shit went nuts.

The security guard immediately threw a punch at Campbell, grazing his head. The force of the blow jarred Chris' head backwards and that, coupled with the subsequent follow-through of the punch, shattered the glass on the front door to the Magic Stick.

Chris continued to leave (as it was clear he was already set to do) and the security guard was flying off the handle at this point, chasing Chris down the street and very audibly threatening to kill him. The other security guard at this point was attempting to restrain the unruly one. It was kinda funny, if only for a second.

A mass of people crowded outside but nothing much happened from there. Chris was fine, a small knot on his forehead was practically unnoticeable. The bouncer was rightly fired on the spot and the higher-ups at the club planned an upcoming meeting on how to deal with punk rock situations.

Aftershow back at the CAID and I finally got to check out this Charlie Slick that all the kids are talking about. While the performance was a tad engaging (flashing lights, bubble machine, confetti), the music was god-awful. I've got no stomach for the mid-80's UK fey electro-pop, let alone a tired re-hash of it twenty years late. I understand people want to dance and believe in something, but the singer's voice is static and unremarkable while his dance moves are high school drama club embarrassing. Too often something is touted just for being different or original without taking a step back for some perspective. And that seems to be the case with Charlie Slick.

As for Detour itself...I don't know what to make of it. It's basically a Detroit-centric website full of pop culture detritus. Movies, music, television...I guess they took their cue from the It Came From Culture City blog. It's cool to have a website that puts on shows and will be somewhat active in promoting cultural happenings in this town, but in the end, I still prefer Steve-O.

74 comments:

Jasper said...

lulz

Anonymous said...

You are such a pompous ass.

Anonymous said...

matt smith needs his own blog.

Anonymous said...

i heart lafayette 4evrz

Anonymous said...

You dumb fuck. I played guitar on half the set.

Anonymous said...

"Didn't the singer used to be in some Indigo Girls folk act?"

Sister Seed.

Alex said...

"The bouncer was rightly fired on the spot and the higher-ups at the club planned an upcoming meeting on how to deal with punk rock situations."


wah wah.

Elizabeth said...

This weekend was fun, but the Magic Stick not letting people under 21 go up and down from the Stick to the Garden Bowl was garbage.

So were the new bouncers.

Anonymous said...

Fuck the Mahonies, Fuck The Terrible Twos, Fuck The Nice Device, Fuck Freer and Fuck the Dirtbombs, and fuck you! I own a Four Tops record!

Anonymous said...

The only difference between you and an MTV V.J. is that you probably don't get laid.

Elwood D. Pennypacker said...

Nothing but good vibes in New York for CMJ right? right? Good vibes, good times, peace in the middle east...right?

Anonymous said...

gward yall

Anonymous said...

I did not realize hot dogs were such a polarizing subject up there.

Anonymous said...

Is it true that your Jack White's nephew and that you'r not the Dirtboms real drummer you just fill in from time to time?

Anonymous said...

Hi Jack White's nephew. Cool Blog Jack White's Nephew.

Anonymous said...

How is Jack White Jack White's nephew. How does his ass taste?

Anonymous said...

Nobody's listening to you. Just because you have a place to publish your internal ramblings in true blog narcissism fashion, doesn't mean anybody gives a fuck what you think. Do you keep your list of probably shitty bands next to your list of reasons why you're an impotent wanker who has nothing better to do but cry out in the forest where nobody can or wants to hear? Critics are the best because they're usually washed up hack "musicians" who have an ax to grind with anyone that's actually having success and writing music that anybody actually gives a fuck about. So fuck off, go play minor chords on a toy piano in your closet with your clown suit on and then cry while you masturbate to a picture of Jack White's balls...

a nony mouse said...

so if no one care's what's written here...why does everyone have such vicious comments? lets see what all these "anonymouses" are writing on thier blogs

Anonymous said...

Your Jack Whites nephew right?

Anonymous said...

Your Jack White's nephew right?

Anonymous said...

Are you related to Jack White?

Anonymous said...

I think you should include in your blog the fact you are Jack White's nephew and that you are not The Dirtbombs main drummer.

duder said...

his is the dirtbombs main drummer (1 of 2) and has been for years, im guessing anonymous is in one the bands his critiqued. Better get used to it man, some people arent gonna like you sometimes. And sometimes there gonna write about it. Dont lose sleep over it babe.

Jack White said...

hold me, ben. i'm lonely tonight.

III

Anonymous said...

fucking a. you child. you headstrong child of a man. your future is blogging and not playing music.

Anonymous said...

I think violence would be the best solution.

Anonymous said...

Hey Ben! So you've never seen Ghost City or Headband? You gotta check them out, they are both fantastic(!), and at times hilarious. In fact, I'm DJing at the Ghost City CD Release Party tonight at Cliff Bell's, you should check it out. Too bad you didn't like Freer - but why so harsh? This goes without saying, but as a music journalist you know that just because you don't like something doesn't mean it's bad music. I mean, I wouldn't put the Muldoons' music on my iPod, but I wouldn't call them "shitty" just because I wasn't into it. I'm not trying to stir any shit-pots, I was just...well, surprised. I guess if the purpose of your blog is just to talk shit and not to actually comment on what's really going in the Detroit music scene, then it's fair. If not, well, then I'm just confused. Intersting read anyway. Hope to see you around soon (tonight!).

Melody

PS - it would be typed: *yawn*

Anonymous said...

Dear Ben,
I heard there's a little crevice in the back of the gold dollar. If you pry off a few boards you can break in . Then find a nice damp spot in a corner and wank off in memory of your preteen days and bands you had no part in. Are you related to Jack White?

I love you.

Coleman A. Young

swank said...

ben, you make me miss detroit more than anything. i love you buddy.

Animus said...

a nony mouse said...
so if no one care's what's written here...why does everyone have such vicious comments? lets see what all these "anonymouses" are writing on thier blogs

Gee you don't think it's because they really care, do you? They know just about everyone and their nephew has more going on than they do and it pisses them off to no end.

BlackJack- said...

the pen truely is mightier than the sword- seems some y'all need to chill out and stop hiding behind your computers, cowards.

Anonymous said...

"I mean, I wouldn't put the Muldoons' music on my iPod, but I wouldn't call them "shitty" just because I wasn't into it."

I'll bite the bullet and call them shitty. But they're still too good for Cass Records...and are thus putting out TWO singles elsewhere.

Anonymous said...

Cum shots in your mothers mouth

Anonymous said...

I like piss.

Anonymous said...

Nice Dave Eggars Swipe! +anonymous!!!

Anonymous said...

does Ben being Jack White's nephew make your band suck any less? probably not.

Kim H. said...

I agree about Freer, I saw them earlier this year, I think they were opening for The Go at the Blind Pig or something. I suppose it's not saying much that I can't remember where and it was less than a year ago.
The Go is the best band anywhere right now. Period.

Anonymous said...

Wow, this an interesting dialogue thats taking place. I guess this guys is doing something right to evoke these extreme responses. My opinion is that
it seems to go against some kind of unspoken code for another musician in the "scene" to take the role of critic and come down on other bands publicly. Especially bands like mine(FREER, jeremy) that struggle to survive. Not that he should feel sorry for us. Thats the way it goes. Life is hard. But it makes sense coming from someone who has never had to stuggle and make any major sacrifices for his music and who's position in his present band came from his relationship with famous people. Which is no insult to the famous people. It just seems that he would be a more of a gracious person. And not some strange combination of a pretentious, close minded underground elitist and shameless asskisser. I also noticed comments left about people hiding behind there computers. Which is funny because that is esentially what this guy Ben is doing. Just because he writes his name soesn't mean he isn't hiding. If it was his paid job to be a critic in a paper and such then so be it. But like a said he is a fellow "musician" in the local scene and that changes it from opinion to something personal. I'm know Matt Smith. We aren't close or anything but he is one of the nicest people I've met this city and a true music lover. So for that I will say if I ever see you face to face my deart little Ben. I will spit in your face. Or kiss you on the lips depending on my mood that night.

Anonymous said...

Sorry about all the bad grammer in that last message.

Anonymous said...

I guess this guys is doing something right to evoke these extreme responses. My opinion is that
it seems to go against some kind of unspoken code for another musician in the "scene" to take the role of critic and come down on other bands publicly. Especially bands like mine(FREER, jeremy) that struggle to survive. Not that he should feel sorry for us. Thats the way it goes. Life is hard. But it makes sense coming from someone who has never had to stuggle and make any major sacrifices for his music and who's position in his present band came from his relationship with famous people. Which is no insult to the famous people. It just seems that he would be a more of a gracious person. And not some strange combination of a pretentious, close minded underground elitist and shameless ass-kisser. I also noticed comments left about people hiding behind there computers. Which is funny because that is esentially what this guy Ben is doing. Just because he writes his name doesn't mean he isn't hiding. If it was his paid job to be a critic in a paper and such then so be it. But like a said he is a fellow "musician" in the local scene and that changes it from opinion to something personal. I'm know Matt Smith. We aren't close or anything but he is one of the nicest people I've met this city and a true music lover. So for that I will say if I ever see you face to face my dear little Ben. I will spit in your face. Or kiss you on the lips depending on my mood that night.

3:36 PM

seer said...

none of the three previous posts changes the fact that freer really does blow. if i were that freer dude, i'd spend more time working on my "craft" rather than replying to what some dickhead wrote about me on some blog.

Anonymous said...

There aren't as many good bands in Detroit as Deadtroiters would like to convince themself of. Bands like the Dirtbombs are the epitome of boring, watered down song writing. Do they even write their own songs? Well, that could be debated. We know for sure that John Gillis' fat nephew doesn't write any of them. Why dont you play some shows as a songwriter Big Ben? Not a writer? well, we all knew that--but the day shall come when this town wakes from it's Garage Rock hangover. Let's face it, Kid Rock and Eminem are the real reason Jack White got so much industry attention. He owes a lot to those fucktards. This Ben fag is a known Ass Pirate, so nobody should take his flabby words of bitterness too seriously.
I mean, parasites are always wishing they were the host.

Sincerely--who gives a fuck about this puke stain?

Anonymous said...

Wow, Ben, you really made some great friends here. Apparently, you are not allowed to voice your opinions without getting spit on. New world order...

I just want to say thanks for the kind words; I appreciate it.

Sincerely,

Sir Isaac Martin Morris, Junior

PS--You're Ben Swank's nephew?

Anonymous said...

PPS--Since this line was left anonymously ("parasites are always wishing they were the host"), does this make it public domain? I'm going to to use it and take all the credit. Take that, anonymous! Serves you right for writing your diatribe while hiding in your cubicle.

XOXO,

IMM, JR

Anonymous said...

"Sincerely--who gives a fuck about this puke stain?"

I dunno, maybe the couple of dozen bands who enjoy the company of Ben enough to release material on Cass? Bands who don't react to a simple critique so violently as to become a small host of internet tough guys

also, +1 Anonymous

Anonymous said...

And all of those bands are very talanted original and full of passion.

Anonymous said...

"Serves you right for writing your diatribe while hiding in your cubicle?"

Great point, but you give him too much credit. Anyone who pens a sentence as doltish as "He owes a lot to those fucktards", could only aspire to cubicle work.

Anonymous said...

hahaha you turds need to spend more time outside.

Anonymous said...

So this is why Jack left Detroit.

Anonymous said...

haha the guy who wrote haha you turds need to spend more time outside needs to spend more time outside.

Anonymous said...

First!!!!

Anonymous said...

I think it's funny that the people who are insulting the people who anonymously leave comments are anonymously leaving comments to do it. As far as I can see nobody has revealed thenselves except the FREER guy.

sincerely,
Anony

Anonymous said...

52 CommentsClose this window Jump to comment form
Jasper said...
lulz

5:15 PM


Anonymous said...
You are such a pompous ass.

10:43 PM


Anonymous said...
matt smith needs his own blog.

1:56 PM


Anonymous said...
i heart lafayette 4evrz

5:02 PM


Anonymous said...
You dumb fuck. I played guitar on half the set.

7:22 PM


Anonymous said...
"Didn't the singer used to be in some Indigo Girls folk act?"

Sister Seed.

10:10 PM


Alex said...
"The bouncer was rightly fired on the spot and the higher-ups at the club planned an upcoming meeting on how to deal with punk rock situations."


wah wah.

1:04 AM


Elizabeth said...
This weekend was fun, but the Magic Stick not letting people under 21 go up and down from the Stick to the Garden Bowl was garbage.

So were the new bouncers.

8:58 PM


Anonymous said...
Fuck the Mahonies, Fuck The Terrible Twos, Fuck The Nice Device, Fuck Freer and Fuck the Dirtbombs, and fuck you! I own a Four Tops record!

11:44 PM


Anonymous said...
The only difference between you and an MTV V.J. is that you probably don't get laid.

11:46 PM


Elwood D. Pennypacker said...
Nothing but good vibes in New York for CMJ right? right? Good vibes, good times, peace in the middle east...right?

2:53 AM


Anonymous said...
gward yall

1:32 PM


Anonymous said...
I did not realize hot dogs were such a polarizing subject up there.

3:16 PM


Anonymous said...
Is it true that your Jack White's nephew and that you'r not the Dirtboms real drummer you just fill in from time to time?

9:05 PM


Anonymous said...
Hi Jack White's nephew. Cool Blog Jack White's Nephew.

2:04 AM


Anonymous said...
How is Jack White Jack White's nephew. How does his ass taste?

2:05 AM


Anonymous said...
Nobody's listening to you. Just because you have a place to publish your internal ramblings in true blog narcissism fashion, doesn't mean anybody gives a fuck what you think. Do you keep your list of probably shitty bands next to your list of reasons why you're an impotent wanker who has nothing better to do but cry out in the forest where nobody can or wants to hear? Critics are the best because they're usually washed up hack "musicians" who have an ax to grind with anyone that's actually having success and writing music that anybody actually gives a fuck about. So fuck off, go play minor chords on a toy piano in your closet with your clown suit on and then cry while you masturbate to a picture of Jack White's balls...

1:19 PM


a nony mouse said...
so if no one care's what's written here...why does everyone have such vicious comments? lets see what all these "anonymouses" are writing on thier blogs

1:43 PM


Anonymous said...
Your Jack Whites nephew right?

3:00 PM


Anonymous said...
Your Jack White's nephew right?

3:01 PM


Anonymous said...
Are you related to Jack White?

3:02 PM


Anonymous said...
I think you should include in your blog the fact you are Jack White's nephew and that you are not The Dirtbombs main drummer.

3:03 PM


duder said...
his is the dirtbombs main drummer (1 of 2) and has been for years, im guessing anonymous is in one the bands his critiqued. Better get used to it man, some people arent gonna like you sometimes. And sometimes there gonna write about it. Dont lose sleep over it babe.

5:03 PM


Jack White said...
hold me, ben. i'm lonely tonight.

III

10:55 PM


Anonymous said...
fucking a. you child. you headstrong child of a man. your future is blogging and not playing music.

3:15 AM


Anonymous said...
I think violence would be the best solution.

3:57 AM


Anonymous said...
Hey Ben! So you've never seen Ghost City or Headband? You gotta check them out, they are both fantastic(!), and at times hilarious. In fact, I'm DJing at the Ghost City CD Release Party tonight at Cliff Bell's, you should check it out. Too bad you didn't like Freer - but why so harsh? This goes without saying, but as a music journalist you know that just because you don't like something doesn't mean it's bad music. I mean, I wouldn't put the Muldoons' music on my iPod, but I wouldn't call them "shitty" just because I wasn't into it. I'm not trying to stir any shit-pots, I was just...well, surprised. I guess if the purpose of your blog is just to talk shit and not to actually comment on what's really going in the Detroit music scene, then it's fair. If not, well, then I'm just confused. Intersting read anyway. Hope to see you around soon (tonight!).

Melody

PS - it would be typed: *yawn*

11:31 AM


Anonymous said...
Dear Ben,
I heard there's a little crevice in the back of the gold dollar. If you pry off a few boards you can break in . Then find a nice damp spot in a corner and wank off in memory of your preteen days and bands you had no part in. Are you related to Jack White?

I love you.

Coleman A. Young

2:32 PM


swank said...
ben, you make me miss detroit more than anything. i love you buddy.

1:34 PM


Animus said...
a nony mouse said...
so if no one care's what's written here...why does everyone have such vicious comments? lets see what all these "anonymouses" are writing on thier blogs

Gee you don't think it's because they really care, do you? They know just about everyone and their nephew has more going on than they do and it pisses them off to no end.

5:09 PM


BlackJack- said...
the pen truely is mightier than the sword- seems some y'all need to chill out and stop hiding behind your computers, cowards.

6:19 PM


Anonymous said...
"I mean, I wouldn't put the Muldoons' music on my iPod, but I wouldn't call them "shitty" just because I wasn't into it."

I'll bite the bullet and call them shitty. But they're still too good for Cass Records...and are thus putting out TWO singles elsewhere.

10:15 PM


Anonymous said...
Cum shots in your mothers mouth

2:50 AM


Anonymous said...
I like piss.

2:55 AM


Anonymous said...
Nice Dave Eggars Swipe! +anonymous!!!

11:25 PM


Anonymous said...
does Ben being Jack White's nephew make your band suck any less? probably not.

4:06 PM


Kim H. said...
I agree about Freer, I saw them earlier this year, I think they were opening for The Go at the Blind Pig or something. I suppose it's not saying much that I can't remember where and it was less than a year ago.
The Go is the best band anywhere right now. Period.

10:53 AM


Anonymous said...
Wow, this an interesting dialogue thats taking place. I guess this guys is doing something right to evoke these extreme responses. My opinion is that
it seems to go against some kind of unspoken code for another musician in the "scene" to take the role of critic and come down on other bands publicly. Especially bands like mine(FREER, jeremy) that struggle to survive. Not that he should feel sorry for us. Thats the way it goes. Life is hard. But it makes sense coming from someone who has never had to stuggle and make any major sacrifices for his music and who's position in his present band came from his relationship with famous people. Which is no insult to the famous people. It just seems that he would be a more of a gracious person. And not some strange combination of a pretentious, close minded underground elitist and shameless asskisser. I also noticed comments left about people hiding behind there computers. Which is funny because that is esentially what this guy Ben is doing. Just because he writes his name soesn't mean he isn't hiding. If it was his paid job to be a critic in a paper and such then so be it. But like a said he is a fellow "musician" in the local scene and that changes it from opinion to something personal. I'm know Matt Smith. We aren't close or anything but he is one of the nicest people I've met this city and a true music lover. So for that I will say if I ever see you face to face my deart little Ben. I will spit in your face. Or kiss you on the lips depending on my mood that night.

3:36 PM


Anonymous said...
Sorry about all the bad grammer in that last message.

3:39 PM


Anonymous said...
I guess this guys is doing something right to evoke these extreme responses. My opinion is that
it seems to go against some kind of unspoken code for another musician in the "scene" to take the role of critic and come down on other bands publicly. Especially bands like mine(FREER, jeremy) that struggle to survive. Not that he should feel sorry for us. Thats the way it goes. Life is hard. But it makes sense coming from someone who has never had to stuggle and make any major sacrifices for his music and who's position in his present band came from his relationship with famous people. Which is no insult to the famous people. It just seems that he would be a more of a gracious person. And not some strange combination of a pretentious, close minded underground elitist and shameless ass-kisser. I also noticed comments left about people hiding behind there computers. Which is funny because that is esentially what this guy Ben is doing. Just because he writes his name doesn't mean he isn't hiding. If it was his paid job to be a critic in a paper and such then so be it. But like a said he is a fellow "musician" in the local scene and that changes it from opinion to something personal. I'm know Matt Smith. We aren't close or anything but he is one of the nicest people I've met this city and a true music lover. So for that I will say if I ever see you face to face my dear little Ben. I will spit in your face. Or kiss you on the lips depending on my mood that night.

3:36 PM

6:16 PM


seer said...
none of the three previous posts changes the fact that freer really does blow. if i were that freer dude, i'd spend more time working on my "craft" rather than replying to what some dickhead wrote about me on some blog.

6:43 PM


Anonymous said...
There aren't as many good bands in Detroit as Deadtroiters would like to convince themself of. Bands like the Dirtbombs are the epitome of boring, watered down song writing. Do they even write their own songs? Well, that could be debated. We know for sure that John Gillis' fat nephew doesn't write any of them. Why dont you play some shows as a songwriter Big Ben? Not a writer? well, we all knew that--but the day shall come when this town wakes from it's Garage Rock hangover. Let's face it, Kid Rock and Eminem are the real reason Jack White got so much industry attention. He owes a lot to those fucktards. This Ben fag is a known Ass Pirate, so nobody should take his flabby words of bitterness too seriously.
I mean, parasites are always wishing they were the host.

Sincerely--who gives a fuck about this puke stain?

2:05 PM


Anonymous said...
Wow, Ben, you really made some great friends here. Apparently, you are not allowed to voice your opinions without getting spit on. New world order...

I just want to say thanks for the kind words; I appreciate it.

Sincerely,

Sir Isaac Martin Morris, Junior

PS--You're Ben Swank's nephew?

1:35 AM


Anonymous said...
PPS--Since this line was left anonymously ("parasites are always wishing they were the host"), does this make it public domain? I'm going to to use it and take all the credit. Take that, anonymous! Serves you right for writing your diatribe while hiding in your cubicle.

XOXO,

IMM, JR

1:43 AM


Anonymous said...
"Sincerely--who gives a fuck about this puke stain?"

I dunno, maybe the couple of dozen bands who enjoy the company of Ben enough to release material on Cass? Bands who don't react to a simple critique so violently as to become a small host of internet tough guys

also, +1 Anonymous

6:34 PM


Anonymous said...
And all of those bands are very talanted original and full of passion.

2:52 AM


Anonymous said...
"Serves you right for writing your diatribe while hiding in your cubicle?"

Great point, but you give him too much credit. Anyone who pens a sentence as doltish as "He owes a lot to those fucktards", could only aspire to cubicle work.

3:22 PM


Anonymous said...
hahaha you turds need to spend more time outside.

3:53 PM


Anonymous said...
So this is why Jack left Detroit.

11:17 PM


Anonymous said...
haha the guy who wrote haha you turds need to spend more time outside needs to spend more time outside.

12:57 AM


Anonymous said...
First!!!!

10:35 AM


Anonymous said...
I think it's funny that the people who are insulting the people who anonymously leave comments are anonymously leaving comments to do it. As far as I can see nobody has revealed thenselves except the FREER guy.

sincerely,
Anony

2:53 PM


Friday night found me catching the last few songs of Carjack's set. Beginning to like him more and more. As a wise man once said, you can't have Detroit without a good carjack. There was a brief moment where his backing track was a spot-on replica of Suicide's drum machine sound. I first had that feeling when some DJ in Europe played Dead Combo's "You Don't Look So Good" (an overlooked classic if there ever was) and you think it'd happen a lot more. But it doesn't. Good for us. Check out CJ's cd-r/demo/whatever and dig on the total Kraftwerk instrumental of "Carbot's Departure"...beautifully sparse and pastoral in an unexpected yet totally welcome change of pace or "departure." Get it?

The Terrible Twos wreaked havoc after that. I can safely say that the Garden Bowl lounge has, pound for pound, hosted an overwhelming majority of my favorite shows in this town. Greenhornes on Superbowl Sunday '99 (2 sets), Soledad Brothers where Swank handed me the drumstix, Clone Defects a billion times, John Gillis solo '01, a rare Patrick Keeler-Tim Vulgar-Jack White jam session from some long-forgotten date in 2001 as well as my first-ever vocal performance, while on drums, doing "Stormy" by the Jesters of Newport.

So the Twos were on and the freaks came out. Within the first thirty seconds of the first song the overzealous security goon had kicked out Colin of the Frustrations for punk shit...you know, pogoing, slamming, whatever it is the kids are calling it these days. More than a few people were awkwardly hoisted over-head in an almost stationary crowd surf precariously trying to avoid the ever-present ceiling fan. This is the way and place that I like to see shows.

And apparently the owners have taken note. I've been told the Garden Bowl will start having more consistent free shows in their lounge. It's more likely to be shows that would usually be upstairs at the Stick and draw 50 people. So instead of constantly reliving that miserable prospect, bands will get paid a flat fee, people will get in for free, the club will rely on bigger bar receipts and in the end EVERYONE enjoys the evening so much more.

The Go did their thing upstairs at the Stick. I kinda prefer when Bobby's just singing. His guitar playing is nothing bad, but the guitar itself is so unpowerful and forgettable. I can't help but worry that the rest of the world will never truly understand or appreciate the genius of these guys. I truly hope they discover their place, because the world needs more bands with their skill and determination. Seeing them in bigger spaces leads me to wonder whether their better-suited as a 5-piece. However, when the crash into "Meet Me at the Movies" no one seems to care and for a brief moment it's as if everything is perfect.

While my personal coney preference is clearly Duly's in Southwest Detroit, my after-show go-to is always American Coney Island. Forget that Mack Rice supposedly wrote "Mustang Sally" at Lafayette. Forget that Lafayette is supposedly where Fred and Patti Smith met. There's no feeling in that place. Too often an old restaurant or club or hotel is trumpeted for the fact that it hasn't changed, that it's been the same since the Thirties or whatever. Half the time that's a good thing. But on Lafayette, I call bullshit. It is uncomfortable, small and sub-par. And the place doesn't even stay open 24 hours! It's no contest. I prefer the sophistication that comes with American's Flatiron-esque vista of two avenues meeting at a V. I can get past the gaudy sports-bar decoration of the place and long for the time when a place naming itself "American" was a sign of pride. Disagree? Bring it on in the comments.

Saturday started at the CAID and the pushed-back scheduling left me having to endure the last half of the Nice Device. How do you type the sound a yawn makes? They sound like bland, sanitized 89x modern rock. Which is good for them, because that has to be what they're going for, as there's no way such mediocrity can be confused for anything else. Didn't the singer used to be in some Indigo Girls folk act?

Following that lameness was the long-awaited return of SSM. I was really slow to warm to this band when they started up two years ago. My initial sentiment was that I'd rather see each one of the band members in their previous/other band....John in the Hentchmen, Marty with the Cyril Lords and Shettler in the classic Sights three-piece line-up. I passed up a chance to put out a 7" by them because I just wasn't "feeling it." That was my loss.

With time, their self-titled album has grown on me like ivy at Wrigley Field. The first three songs (which were the proposed 7" tunes) are flawless and the memorable moments do not stop there. The craft behind songs like "Dinosaur" and "2012" as well as "Sick" is phenomenal and the whole thing is easily one of the best full-lengths to emerge from Detroit in the past 10 years.

Their performance was solid. All the old songs held their weight. Was glad to see Shettler without the drum machine, but then thought that the newer songs sounded a bit thin in the rhythm department. I'm also a fan of them without the light show. Focus on the tunes and the crowd will focus on you. Dare I say I'm excited to hear what their upcoming full-length has to offer.

Walked in halfway through the Mahonies' Garden Bowl set. I'd first been hipped to these guys last year when word on the street was that they'd be doing an impromptu guerrilla gig through an unguarded power supply at Tastefest. Some douche told me the wrong time and I missed it. So this would be my first time seeing the Mahonies and it was perfection. I'd missed the band-sponsored coney eating contest (won by Hunter Muldoon with a respectable four coney dogs downed) but was otherwise wowed with their otherworldly absurdly dumb genius. Like the Ramones, the Stooges, the Sneaky Pinks before them...you either get it instantly or are perpetually confused. And a song written about Clone Defects bassist Chuck Fogg? Unreal! I must've had 4 different people come up to tell me the Mahonies were their new favorite band. And I'm in agreement with them. I got to get them on Cass...it should be possible to fit 8 songs on one side of a 45.

Freer upstairs was horrid. Someone mentioned to me that they'd seen lots of bands lately with a piano-playing lead singer. Interested and thinking they'd meant local bands, I inquired "Really?" to which they replied, "Yeah. Coldplay, Keane..." And that's the unfavorable company I would lump Freer in with. And in a lot of ways, I love this.

I love the fact that I've been hearing about this band for God-knows how long and keep making that mental note that I still need to check them out. Even if what I've read about them has failed to intrigue me or spark my interest, I still gotta know what's up, in my own opinion, on my own terms, for my own sake. So to finally see this band and be able to say in my own voice that they are shitty...nothing beats that. Still on the to-see-if-they're-shitty list: Johnny Headband, Bang Bang, Ghost City and a ton of other shit that is most-likely shitty.

The unexpected (unexplained?) return of Ko and the Knockouts drew a sizable crowd at the Stick. The Decks crew were up front in full-effect and singing and dancing like the lovable fools they are. Eddie Baranek is surprisingly captivating onstage when he's not drunk off his ass. Ko was a little spotty at first, but eventually found her footing.

Good heckles heard were: as Ko said "This many people didn't like us when we were really a band..." to which some smartass replied "We still don't!" and when Baranek introduced a song as being "written in my US History after 1945 class" a razor-witted one remarked "Get your degree!" And that is my new favorite band taunt. Get a degree. Don't hesitate to use it. Steve Nawara joined for the last few songs and they ended with "Black and Blue" their best-known song as featured on the Sympathetic Sounds of Detroit compilation that no one ever got paid for.

Downstairs immediately afterwards were the Frustrations. While the crowd reaction was tepid (most likely in response to the same overzealous security guard from the previous night in attendance) it did not keep this collection of weirdos from destroying. When they cruised into "Exploding Mind" I moved more than I would all weekend. Dancy? Calypso? Is Dunkerly finally listening to some Fire*Eater drumming? Either way, shit was tits.

Random unsolicited Matt Smith comment:
"It's like (GI) meets Band of Gypsies"

And allow me a brief aside on the topic of unsolicited Matt Smith comments. Matt is always coming up with these zany pairings of bands to try and describe something. I think the first one I ever was privy to was him comparing the Buzzards to Motorhead and the Velvet Underground, and I'm sure they were doing something like having a tea party in Valhalla or some bullshit. The thing is, whenever Matt makes these distinctions, while he may be somewhat close to describing the sound, he just sounds so asinine that I can't help and discredit EVERYTHING he says afterwards. He's so immersed in obscure records and recordings to notice the obvious and likely comparisons for bands. And, for some reason, this really irritates me.

Anyway, to end their set, Colin from the Frustrations climbs on a chair and smacks his guitar down on a cocktail table. He breaks a few bottles, nothing crazy, but nevertheless a good ending exclamation point for the show that would ultimately end in utter mayhem.

The previously-mentioned overzealous security guard took this as an affront and overreacted. He was closely followed by an heretofore unmentioned security guard (it's worth mentioning both of these guys are pretty damned new to the job). One of them goes after Colin and the other grabs his guitar. Big no-no. Don't ever touch anyone else's guitar even when they let you. Let alone some burly dude who's probably never held one before and is likely to break the instrument that Colin built himself.

Chris Campbell of the Terrible Twos (essentially big brother to the Frustrations guys) calmly tries to grab the guitar back and this other security guard flies off the handle. He grabs Chris, starts unnecessarily pushing him out the door where Chris is clearly willing to do so of his own volition. I got in the guy's face for a second and said "You need to chill out" and was fucking scared to shit. He had the crazy-eyed stare and I backed off. While still being pushed out the door Chris spit in his face and shit went nuts.

The security guard immediately threw a punch at Campbell, grazing his head. The force of the blow jarred Chris' head backwards and that, coupled with the subsequent follow-through of the punch, shattered the glass on the front door to the Magic Stick.

Chris continued to leave (as it was clear he was already set to do) and the security guard was flying off the handle at this point, chasing Chris down the street and very audibly threatening to kill him. The other security guard at this point was attempting to restrain the unruly one. It was kinda funny, if only for a second.

A mass of people crowded outside but nothing much happened from there. Chris was fine, a small knot on his forehead was practically unnoticeable. The bouncer was rightly fired on the spot and the higher-ups at the club planned an upcoming meeting on how to deal with punk rock situations.

Aftershow back at the CAID and I finally got to check out this Charlie Slick that all the kids are talking about. While the performance was a tad engaging (flashing lights, bubble machine, confetti), the music was god-awful. I've got no stomach for the mid-80's UK fey electro-pop, let alone a tired re-hash of it twenty years late. I understand people want to dance and believe in something, but the singer's voice is static and unremarkable while his dance moves are high school drama club embarrassing. Too often something is touted just for being different or original without taking a step back for some perspective. And that seems to be the case with Charlie Slick.

As for Detour itself...I don't know what to make of it. It's basically a Detroit-centric website full of pop culture detritus. Movies, music, television...I guess they took their cue from the It Came From Culture City blog. It's cool to have a website that puts on shows and will be somewhat active in promoting cultural happenings in this town, but in the end, I still prefer Steve-O.
posted by cassdetroit at 7:48 PM on Sep 24, 2007

Anonymous said...

(most likely in response to the same overzealous security guard from the previous night in attendance) it did not keep this collection of weirdos from destroying. When they cruised into "Exploding Mind" I moved more than I would all weekend. Dancy? Calypso? Is Dunkerly finally listening to some Fire*

Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

55 CommentsClose this window Jump to comment form
Jasper said...
lulz

5:15 PM


Anonymous said...
You are such a pompous ass.

10:43 PM


Anonymous said...
matt smith needs his own blog.

1:56 PM


Anonymous said...
i heart lafayette 4evrz

5:02 PM


Anonymous said...
You dumb fuck. I played guitar on half the set.

7:22 PM


Anonymous said...
"Didn't the singer used to be in some Indigo Girls folk act?"

Sister Seed.

10:10 PM


Alex said...
"The bouncer was rightly fired on the spot and the higher-ups at the club planned an upcoming meeting on how to deal with punk rock situations."


wah wah.

1:04 AM


Elizabeth said...
This weekend was fun, but the Magic Stick not letting people under 21 go up and down from the Stick to the Garden Bowl was garbage.

So were the new bouncers.

8:58 PM


Anonymous said...
Fuck the Mahonies, Fuck The Terrible Twos, Fuck The Nice Device, Fuck Freer and Fuck the Dirtbombs, and fuck you! I own a Four Tops record!

11:44 PM

Anonymous said...

56 CommentsClose this window Jump to comment form 56 CommentsClose this window Jump to comment form
Jasper said...
lulz

5:15 PM


Anonymous said...
You are such a pompous ass.

10:43 PM


Anonymous said...
matt smith needs his own blog.

1:56 PM


Anonymous said...
i heart lafayette 4evrz

5:02 PM


Anonymous said...
You dumb fuck. I played guitar on half the set.

7:22 PM


Anonymous said...
"Didn't the singer used to be in some Indigo Girls folk act?"

Sister Seed.

10:10 PM


Alex said...
"The bouncer was rightly fired on the spot and the higher-ups at the club planned an upcoming meeting on how to deal with punk rock situations."


wah wah.

1:04 AM


Elizabeth said...
This weekend was fun, but the Magic Stick not letting people under 21 go up and down from the Stick to the Garden Bowl was garbage.

So were the new bouncers.

8:58 PM


Anonymous said...
Fuck the Mahonies, Fuck The Terrible Twos, Fuck The Nice Device, Fuck Freer and Fuck the Dirtbombs, and fuck you! I own a Four Tops record!

11:44 PM


Anonymous said...
The only difference between you and an MTV V.J. is that you probably don't get laid.

11:46 PM


Elwood D. Pennypacker said...
Nothing but good vibes in New York for CMJ right? right? Good vibes, good times, peace in the middle east...right?

2:53 AM


Anonymous said...
gward yall

1:32 PM


Anonymous said...
I did not realize hot dogs were such a polarizing subject up there.

3:16 PM


Anonymous said...
Is it true that your Jack White's nephew and that you'r not the Dirtboms real drummer you just fill in from time to time?

9:05 PM


Anonymous said...
Hi Jack White's nephew. Cool Blog Jack White's Nephew.

2:04 AM


Anonymous said...
How is Jack White Jack White's nephew. How does his ass taste?

2:05 AM


Anonymous said...
Nobody's listening to you. Just because you have a place to publish your internal ramblings in true blog narcissism fashion, doesn't mean anybody gives a fuck what you think. Do you keep your list of probably shitty bands next to your list of reasons why you're an impotent wanker who has nothing better to do but cry out in the forest where nobody can or wants to hear? Critics are the best because they're usually washed up hack "musicians" who have an ax to grind with anyone that's actually having success and writing music that anybody actually gives a fuck about. So fuck off, go play minor chords on a toy piano in your closet with your clown suit on and then cry while you masturbate to a picture of Jack White's balls...

1:19 PM


a nony mouse said...
so if no one care's what's written here...why does everyone have such vicious comments? lets see what all these "anonymouses" are writing on thier blogs

1:43 PM


Anonymous said...
Your Jack Whites nephew right?

3:00 PM


Anonymous said...
Your Jack White's nephew right?

3:01 PM


Anonymous said...
Are you related to Jack White?

3:02 PM


Anonymous said...
I think you should include in your blog the fact you are Jack White's nephew and that you are not The Dirtbombs main drummer.

3:03 PM


duder said...
his is the dirtbombs main drummer (1 of 2) and has been for years, im guessing anonymous is in one the bands his critiqued. Better get used to it man, some people arent gonna like you sometimes. And sometimes there gonna write about it. Dont lose sleep over it babe.

5:03 PM


Jack White said...
hold me, ben. i'm lonely tonight.

III

10:55 PM


Anonymous said...
fucking a. you child. you headstrong child of a man. your future is blogging and not playing music.

3:15 AM


Anonymous said...
I think violence would be the best solution.

3:57 AM


Anonymous said...
Hey Ben! So you've never seen Ghost City or Headband? You gotta check them out, they are both fantastic(!), and at times hilarious. In fact, I'm DJing at the Ghost City CD Release Party tonight at Cliff Bell's, you should check it out. Too bad you didn't like Freer - but why so harsh? This goes without saying, but as a music journalist you know that just because you don't like something doesn't mean it's bad music. I mean, I wouldn't put the Muldoons' music on my iPod, but I wouldn't call them "shitty" just because I wasn't into it. I'm not trying to stir any shit-pots, I was just...well, surprised. I guess if the purpose of your blog is just to talk shit and not to actually comment on what's really going in the Detroit music scene, then it's fair. If not, well, then I'm just confused. Intersting read anyway. Hope to see you around soon (tonight!).

Melody

PS - it would be typed: *yawn*

11:31 AM


Anonymous said...
Dear Ben,
I heard there's a little crevice in the back of the gold dollar. If you pry off a few boards you can break in . Then find a nice damp spot in a corner and wank off in memory of your preteen days and bands you had no part in. Are you related to Jack White?

I love you.

Coleman A. Young

2:32 PM


swank said...
ben, you make me miss detroit more than anything. i love you buddy.

1:34 PM


Animus said...
a nony mouse said...
so if no one care's what's written here...why does everyone have such vicious comments? lets see what all these "anonymouses" are writing on thier blogs

Gee you don't think it's because they really care, do you? They know just about everyone and their nephew has more going on than they do and it pisses them off to no end.

5:09 PM


BlackJack- said...
the pen truely is mightier than the sword- seems some y'all need to chill out and stop hiding behind your computers, cowards.

6:19 PM


Anonymous said...
"I mean, I wouldn't put the Muldoons' music on my iPod, but I wouldn't call them "shitty" just because I wasn't into it."

I'll bite the bullet and call them shitty. But they're still too good for Cass Records...and are thus putting out TWO singles elsewhere.

10:15 PM


Anonymous said...
Cum shots in your mothers mouth

2:50 AM


Anonymous said...
I like piss.

2:55 AM


Anonymous said...
Nice Dave Eggars Swipe! +anonymous!!!

11:25 PM


Anonymous said...
does Ben being Jack White's nephew make your band suck any less? probably not.

4:06 PM


Kim H. said...
I agree about Freer, I saw them earlier this year, I think they were opening for The Go at the Blind Pig or something. I suppose it's not saying much that I can't remember where and it was less than a year ago.
The Go is the best band anywhere right now. Period.

10:53 AM


Anonymous said...
Wow, this an interesting dialogue thats taking place. I guess this guys is doing something right to evoke these extreme responses. My opinion is that
it seems to go against some kind of unspoken code for another musician in the "scene" to take the role of critic and come down on other bands publicly. Especially bands like mine(FREER, jeremy) that struggle to survive. Not that he should feel sorry for us. Thats the way it goes. Life is hard. But it makes sense coming from someone who has never had to stuggle and make any major sacrifices for his music and who's position in his present band came from his relationship with famous people. Which is no insult to the famous people. It just seems that he would be a more of a gracious person. And not some strange combination of a pretentious, close minded underground elitist and shameless asskisser. I also noticed comments left about people hiding behind there computers. Which is funny because that is esentially what this guy Ben is doing. Just because he writes his name soesn't mean he isn't hiding. If it was his paid job to be a critic in a paper and such then so be it. But like a said he is a fellow "musician" in the local scene and that changes it from opinion to something personal. I'm know Matt Smith. We aren't close or anything but he is one of the nicest people I've met this city and a true music lover. So for that I will say if I ever see you face to face my deart little Ben. I will spit in your face. Or kiss you on the lips depending on my mood that night.

3:36 PM


Anonymous said...
Sorry about all the bad grammer in that last message.

3:39 PM


Anonymous said...
I guess this guys is doing something right to evoke these extreme responses. My opinion is that
it seems to go against some kind of unspoken code for another musician in the "scene" to take the role of critic and come down on other bands publicly. Especially bands like mine(FREER, jeremy) that struggle to survive. Not that he should feel sorry for us. Thats the way it goes. Life is hard. But it makes sense coming from someone who has never had to stuggle and make any major sacrifices for his music and who's position in his present band came from his relationship with famous people. Which is no insult to the famous people. It just seems that he would be a more of a gracious person. And not some strange combination of a pretentious, close minded underground elitist and shameless ass-kisser. I also noticed comments left about people hiding behind there computers. Which is funny because that is esentially what this guy Ben is doing. Just because he writes his name doesn't mean he isn't hiding. If it was his paid job to be a critic in a paper and such then so be it. But like a said he is a fellow "musician" in the local scene and that changes it from opinion to something personal. I'm know Matt Smith. We aren't close or anything but he is one of the nicest people I've met this city and a true music lover. So for that I will say if I ever see you face to face my dear little Ben. I will spit in your face. Or kiss you on the lips depending on my mood that night.

3:36 PM

6:16 PM


seer said...
none of the three previous posts changes the fact that freer really does blow. if i were that freer dude, i'd spend more time working on my "craft" rather than replying to what some dickhead wrote about me on some blog.

6:43 PM


Anonymous said...
There aren't as many good bands in Detroit as Deadtroiters would like to convince themself of. Bands like the Dirtbombs are the epitome of boring, watered down song writing. Do they even write their own songs? Well, that could be debated. We know for sure that John Gillis' fat nephew doesn't write any of them. Why dont you play some shows as a songwriter Big Ben? Not a writer? well, we all knew that--but the day shall come when this town wakes from it's Garage Rock hangover. Let's face it, Kid Rock and Eminem are the real reason Jack White got so much industry attention. He owes a lot to those fucktards. This Ben fag is a known Ass Pirate, so nobody should take his flabby words of bitterness too seriously.
I mean, parasites are always wishing they were the host.

Sincerely--who gives a fuck about this puke stain?

2:05 PM


Anonymous said...
Wow, Ben, you really made some great friends here. Apparently, you are not allowed to voice your opinions without getting spit on. New world order...

I just want to say thanks for the kind words; I appreciate it.

Sincerely,

Sir Isaac Martin Morris, Junior

PS--You're Ben Swank's nephew?

1:35 AM


Anonymous said...
PPS--Since this line was left anonymously ("parasites are always wishing they were the host"), does this make it public domain? I'm going to to use it and take all the credit. Take that, anonymous! Serves you right for writing your diatribe while hiding in your cubicle.

XOXO,

IMM, JR

1:43 AM


Anonymous said...
"Sincerely--who gives a fuck about this puke stain?"

I dunno, maybe the couple of dozen bands who enjoy the company of Ben enough to release material on Cass? Bands who don't react to a simple critique so violently as to become a small host of internet tough guys

also, +1 Anonymous

6:34 PM


Anonymous said...
And all of those bands are very talanted original and full of passion.

2:52 AM


Anonymous said...
"Serves you right for writing your diatribe while hiding in your cubicle?"

Great point, but you give him too much credit. Anyone who pens a sentence as doltish as "He owes a lot to those fucktards", could only aspire to cubicle work.

3:22 PM


Anonymous said...
hahaha you turds need to spend more time outside.

3:53 PM


Anonymous said...
So this is why Jack left Detroit.

11:17 PM


Anonymous said...
haha the guy who wrote haha you turds need to spend more time outside needs to spend more time outside.

12:57 AM


Anonymous said...
First!!!!

10:35 AM


Anonymous said...
I think it's funny that the people who are insulting the people who anonymously leave comments are anonymously leaving comments to do it. As far as I can see nobody has revealed thenselves except the FREER guy.

sincerely,
Anony

2:53 PM


Anonymous said...
52 CommentsClose this window Jump to comment form
Jasper said...
lulz

5:15 PM


Anonymous said...
You are such a pompous ass.

10:43 PM


Anonymous said...
matt smith needs his own blog.

1:56 PM


Anonymous said...
i heart lafayette 4evrz

5:02 PM


Anonymous said...
You dumb fuck. I played guitar on half the set.

7:22 PM


Anonymous said...
"Didn't the singer used to be in some Indigo Girls folk act?"

Sister Seed.

10:10 PM


Alex said...
"The bouncer was rightly fired on the spot and the higher-ups at the club planned an upcoming meeting on how to deal with punk rock situations."


wah wah.

1:04 AM


Elizabeth said...
This weekend was fun, but the Magic Stick not letting people under 21 go up and down from the Stick to the Garden Bowl was garbage.

So were the new bouncers.

8:58 PM


Anonymous said...
Fuck the Mahonies, Fuck The Terrible Twos, Fuck The Nice Device, Fuck Freer and Fuck the Dirtbombs, and fuck you! I own a Four Tops record!

11:44 PM


Anonymous said...
The only difference between you and an MTV V.J. is that you probably don't get laid.

11:46 PM


Elwood D. Pennypacker said...
Nothing but good vibes in New York for CMJ right? right? Good vibes, good times, peace in the middle east...right?

2:53 AM


Anonymous said...
gward yall

1:32 PM


Anonymous said...
I did not realize hot dogs were such a polarizing subject up there.

3:16 PM


Anonymous said...
Is it true that your Jack White's nephew and that you'r not the Dirtboms real drummer you just fill in from time to time?

9:05 PM


Anonymous said...
Hi Jack White's nephew. Cool Blog Jack White's Nephew.

2:04 AM


Anonymous said...
How is Jack White Jack White's nephew. How does his ass taste?

2:05 AM


Anonymous said...
Nobody's listening to you. Just because you have a place to publish your internal ramblings in true blog narcissism fashion, doesn't mean anybody gives a fuck what you think. Do you keep your list of probably shitty bands next to your list of reasons why you're an impotent wanker who has nothing better to do but cry out in the forest where nobody can or wants to hear? Critics are the best because they're usually washed up hack "musicians" who have an ax to grind with anyone that's actually having success and writing music that anybody actually gives a fuck about. So fuck off, go play minor chords on a toy piano in your closet with your clown suit on and then cry while you masturbate to a picture of Jack White's balls...

1:19 PM


a nony mouse said...
so if no one care's what's written here...why does everyone have such vicious comments? lets see what all these "anonymouses" are writing on thier blogs

1:43 PM


Anonymous said...
Your Jack Whites nephew right?

3:00 PM


Anonymous said...
Your Jack White's nephew right?

3:01 PM


Anonymous said...
Are you related to Jack White?

3:02 PM


Anonymous said...
I think you should include in your blog the fact you are Jack White's nephew and that you are not The Dirtbombs main drummer.

3:03 PM


duder said...
his is the dirtbombs main drummer (1 of 2) and has been for years, im guessing anonymous is in one the bands his critiqued. Better get used to it man, some people arent gonna like you sometimes. And sometimes there gonna write about it. Dont lose sleep over it babe.

5:03 PM


Jack White said...
hold me, ben. i'm lonely tonight.

III

10:55 PM


Anonymous said...
fucking a. you child. you headstrong child of a man. your future is blogging and not playing music.

3:15 AM


Anonymous said...
I think violence would be the best solution.

3:57 AM


Anonymous said...
Hey Ben! So you've never seen Ghost City or Headband? You gotta check them out, they are both fantastic(!), and at times hilarious. In fact, I'm DJing at the Ghost City CD Release Party tonight at Cliff Bell's, you should check it out. Too bad you didn't like Freer - but why so harsh? This goes without saying, but as a music journalist you know that just because you don't like something doesn't mean it's bad music. I mean, I wouldn't put the Muldoons' music on my iPod, but I wouldn't call them "shitty" just because I wasn't into it. I'm not trying to stir any shit-pots, I was just...well, surprised. I guess if the purpose of your blog is just to talk shit and not to actually comment on what's really going in the Detroit music scene, then it's fair. If not, well, then I'm just confused. Intersting read anyway. Hope to see you around soon (tonight!).

Melody

PS - it would be typed: *yawn*

11:31 AM


Anonymous said...
Dear Ben,
I heard there's a little crevice in the back of the gold dollar. If you pry off a few boards you can break in . Then find a nice damp spot in a corner and wank off in memory of your preteen days and bands you had no part in. Are you related to Jack White?

I love you.

Coleman A. Young

2:32 PM


swank said...
ben, you make me miss detroit more than anything. i love you buddy.

1:34 PM


Animus said...
a nony mouse said...
so if no one care's what's written here...why does everyone have such vicious comments? lets see what all these "anonymouses" are writing on thier blogs

Gee you don't think it's because they really care, do you? They know just about everyone and their nephew has more going on than they do and it pisses them off to no end.

5:09 PM


BlackJack- said...
the pen truely is mightier than the sword- seems some y'all need to chill out and stop hiding behind your computers, cowards.

6:19 PM


Anonymous said...
"I mean, I wouldn't put the Muldoons' music on my iPod, but I wouldn't call them "shitty" just because I wasn't into it."

I'll bite the bullet and call them shitty. But they're still too good for Cass Records...and are thus putting out TWO singles elsewhere.

10:15 PM


Anonymous said...
Cum shots in your mothers mouth

2:50 AM


Anonymous said...
I like piss.

2:55 AM


Anonymous said...
Nice Dave Eggars Swipe! +anonymous!!!

11:25 PM


Anonymous said...
does Ben being Jack White's nephew make your band suck any less? probably not.

4:06 PM


Kim H. said...
I agree about Freer, I saw them earlier this year, I think they were opening for The Go at the Blind Pig or something. I suppose it's not saying much that I can't remember where and it was less than a year ago.
The Go is the best band anywhere right now. Period.

10:53 AM


Anonymous said...
Wow, this an interesting dialogue thats taking place. I guess this guys is doing something right to evoke these extreme responses. My opinion is that
it seems to go against some kind of unspoken code for another musician in the "scene" to take the role of critic and come down on other bands publicly. Especially bands like mine(FREER, jeremy) that struggle to survive. Not that he should feel sorry for us. Thats the way it goes. Life is hard. But it makes sense coming from someone who has never had to stuggle and make any major sacrifices for his music and who's position in his present band came from his relationship with famous people. Which is no insult to the famous people. It just seems that he would be a more of a gracious person. And not some strange combination of a pretentious, close minded underground elitist and shameless asskisser. I also noticed comments left about people hiding behind there computers. Which is funny because that is esentially what this guy Ben is doing. Just because he writes his name soesn't mean he isn't hiding. If it was his paid job to be a critic in a paper and such then so be it. But like a said he is a fellow "musician" in the local scene and that changes it from opinion to something personal. I'm know Matt Smith. We aren't close or anything but he is one of the nicest people I've met this city and a true music lover. So for that I will say if I ever see you face to face my deart little Ben. I will spit in your face. Or kiss you on the lips depending on my mood that night.

3:36 PM


Anonymous said...
Sorry about all the bad grammer in that last message.

3:39 PM


Anonymous said...
I guess this guys is doing something right to evoke these extreme responses. My opinion is that
it seems to go against some kind of unspoken code for another musician in the "scene" to take the role of critic and come down on other bands publicly. Especially bands like mine(FREER, jeremy) that struggle to survive. Not that he should feel sorry for us. Thats the way it goes. Life is hard. But it makes sense coming from someone who has never had to stuggle and make any major sacrifices for his music and who's position in his present band came from his relationship with famous people. Which is no insult to the famous people. It just seems that he would be a more of a gracious person. And not some strange combination of a pretentious, close minded underground elitist and shameless ass-kisser. I also noticed comments left about people hiding behind there computers. Which is funny because that is esentially what this guy Ben is doing. Just because he writes his name doesn't mean he isn't hiding. If it was his paid job to be a critic in a paper and such then so be it. But like a said he is a fellow "musician" in the local scene and that changes it from opinion to something personal. I'm know Matt Smith. We aren't close or anything but he is one of the nicest people I've met this city and a true music lover. So for that I will say if I ever see you face to face my dear little Ben. I will spit in your face. Or kiss you on the lips depending on my mood that night.

3:36 PM

6:16 PM


seer said...
none of the three previous posts changes the fact that freer really does blow. if i were that freer dude, i'd spend more time working on my "craft" rather than replying to what some dickhead wrote about me on some blog.

6:43 PM


Anonymous said...
There aren't as many good bands in Detroit as Deadtroiters would like to convince themself of. Bands like the Dirtbombs are the epitome of boring, watered down song writing. Do they even write their own songs? Well, that could be debated. We know for sure that John Gillis' fat nephew doesn't write any of them. Why dont you play some shows as a songwriter Big Ben? Not a writer? well, we all knew that--but the day shall come when this town wakes from it's Garage Rock hangover. Let's face it, Kid Rock and Eminem are the real reason Jack White got so much industry attention. He owes a lot to those fucktards. This Ben fag is a known Ass Pirate, so nobody should take his flabby words of bitterness too seriously.
I mean, parasites are always wishing they were the host.

Sincerely--who gives a fuck about this puke stain?

2:05 PM


Anonymous said...
Wow, Ben, you really made some great friends here. Apparently, you are not allowed to voice your opinions without getting spit on. New world order...

I just want to say thanks for the kind words; I appreciate it.

Sincerely,

Sir Isaac Martin Morris, Junior

PS--You're Ben Swank's nephew?

1:35 AM


Anonymous said...
PPS--Since this line was left anonymously ("parasites are always wishing they were the host"), does this make it public domain? I'm going to to use it and take all the credit. Take that, anonymous! Serves you right for writing your diatribe while hiding in your cubicle.

XOXO,



Jasper said...
lulz

5:15 PM


Anonymous said...
You are such a pompous ass.

10:43 PM


Anonymous said...
matt smith needs his own blog.

1:56 PM


Anonymous said...
i heart lafayette 4evrz

5:02 PM


Anonymous said...
You dumb fuck. I played guitar on half the set.

7:22 PM


Anonymous said...
"Didn't the singer used to be in some Indigo Girls folk act?"

Sister Seed.

10:10 PM


Alex said...
"The bouncer was rightly fired on the spot and the higher-ups at the club planned an upcoming meeting on how to deal with punk rock situations."


wah wah.

1:04 AM


Elizabeth said...
This weekend was fun, but the Magic Stick not letting people under 21 go up and down from the Stick to the Garden Bowl was garbage.

So were the new bouncers.

8:58 PM


Anonymous said...
Fuck the Mahonies, Fuck The Terrible Twos, Fuck The Nice Device, Fuck Freer and Fuck the Dirtbombs, and fuck you! I own a Four Tops record!

11:44 PM


Anonymous said...
The only difference between you and an MTV V.J. is that you probably don't get laid.

11:46 PM


Elwood D. Pennypacker said...
Nothing but good vibes in New York for CMJ right? right? Good vibes, good times, peace in the middle east...right?

2:53 AM


Anonymous said...
gward yall

1:32 PM


Anonymous said...
I did not realize hot dogs were such a polarizing subject up there.

3:16 PM


Anonymous said...
Is it true that your Jack White's nephew and that you'r not the Dirtboms real drummer you just fill in from time to time?

9:05 PM


Anonymous said...
Hi Jack White's nephew. Cool Blog Jack White's Nephew.

2:04 AM


Anonymous said...
How is Jack White Jack White's nephew. How does his ass taste?

2:05 AM


Anonymous said...
Nobody's listening to you. Just because you have a place to publish your internal ramblings in true blog narcissism fashion, doesn't mean anybody gives a fuck what you think. Do you keep your list of probably shitty bands next to your list of reasons why you're an impotent wanker who has nothing better to do but cry out in the forest where nobody can or wants to hear? Critics are the best because they're usually washed up hack "musicians" who have an ax to grind with anyone that's actually having success and writing music that anybody actually gives a fuck about. So fuck off, go play minor chords on a toy piano in your closet with your clown suit on and then cry while you masturbate to a picture of Jack White's balls...

1:19 PM


a nony mouse said...
so if no one care's what's written here...why does everyone have such vicious comments? lets see what all these "anonymouses" are writing on thier blogs

1:43 PM


Anonymous said...
Your Jack Whites nephew right?

3:00 PM


Anonymous said...
Your Jack White's nephew right?

3:01 PM


Anonymous said...
Are you related to Jack White?

3:02 PM


Anonymous said...
I think you should include in your blog the fact you are Jack White's nephew and that you are not The Dirtbombs main drummer.

3:03 PM


duder said...
his is the dirtbombs main drummer (1 of 2) and has been for years, im guessing anonymous is in one the bands his critiqued. Better get used to it man, some people arent gonna like you sometimes. And sometimes there gonna write about it. Dont lose sleep over it babe.

5:03 PM


Jack White said...
hold me, ben. i'm lonely tonight.

III

10:55 PM


Anonymous said...
fucking a. you child. you headstrong child of a man. your future is blogging and not playing music.

3:15 AM


Anonymous said...
I think violence would be the best solution.

3:57 AM


Anonymous said...
Hey Ben! So you've never seen Ghost City or Headband? You gotta check them out, they are both fantastic(!), and at times hilarious. In fact, I'm DJing at the Ghost City CD Release Party tonight at Cliff Bell's, you should check it out. Too bad you didn't like Freer - but why so harsh? This goes without saying, but as a music journalist you know that just because you don't like something doesn't mean it's bad music. I mean, I wouldn't put the Muldoons' music on my iPod, but I wouldn't call them "shitty" just because I wasn't into it. I'm not trying to stir any shit-pots, I was just...well, surprised. I guess if the purpose of your blog is just to talk shit and not to actually comment on what's really going in the Detroit music scene, then it's fair. If not, well, then I'm just confused. Intersting read anyway. Hope to see you around soon (tonight!).

Melody

PS - it would be typed: *yawn*

11:31 AM


Anonymous said...
Dear Ben,
I heard there's a little crevice in the back of the gold dollar. If you pry off a few boards you can break in . Then find a nice damp spot in a corner and wank off in memory of your preteen days and bands you had no part in. Are you related to Jack White?

I love you.

Coleman A. Young

2:32 PM


swank said...
ben, you make me miss detroit more than anything. i love you buddy.

1:34 PM


Animus said...
a nony mouse said...
so if no one care's what's written here...why does everyone have such vicious comments? lets see what all these "anonymouses" are writing on thier blogs

Gee you don't think it's because they really care, do you? They know just about everyone and their nephew has more going on than they do and it pisses them off to no end.

5:09 PM


BlackJack- said...
the pen truely is mightier than the sword- seems some y'all need to chill out and stop hiding behind your computers, cowards.

6:19 PM


Anonymous said...
"I mean, I wouldn't put the Muldoons' music on my iPod, but I wouldn't call them "shitty" just because I wasn't into it."

I'll bite the bullet and call them shitty. But they're still too good for Cass Records...and are thus putting out TWO singles elsewhere.

10:15 PM


Anonymous said...
Cum shots in your mothers mouth

2:50 AM


Anonymous said...
I like piss.

2:55 AM


Anonymous said...
Nice Dave Eggars Swipe! +anonymous!!!

11:25 PM


Anonymous said...
does Ben being Jack White's nephew make your band suck any less? probably not.

4:06 PM


Kim H. said...
I agree about Freer, I saw them earlier this year, I think they were opening for The Go at the Blind Pig or something. I suppose it's not saying much that I can't remember where and it was less than a year ago.
The Go is the best band anywhere right now. Period.

10:53 AM


Anonymous said...
Wow, this an interesting dialogue thats taking place. I guess this guys is doing something right to evoke these extreme responses. My opinion is that
it seems to go against some kind of unspoken code for another musician in the "scene" to take the role of critic and come down on other bands publicly. Especially bands like mine(FREER, jeremy) that struggle to survive. Not that he should feel sorry for us. Thats the way it goes. Life is hard. But it makes sense coming from someone who has never had to stuggle and make any major sacrifices for his music and who's position in his present band came from his relationship with famous people. Which is no insult to the famous people. It just seems that he would be a more of a gracious person. And not some strange combination of a pretentious, close minded underground elitist and shameless asskisser. I also noticed comments left about people hiding behind there computers. Which is funny because that is esentially what this guy Ben is doing. Just because he writes his name soesn't mean he isn't hiding. If it was his paid job to be a critic in a paper and such then so be it. But like a said he is a fellow "musician" in the local scene and that changes it from opinion to something personal. I'm know Matt Smith. We aren't close or anything but he is one of the nicest people I've met this city and a true music lover. So for that I will say if I ever see you face to face my deart little Ben. I will spit in your face. Or kiss you on the lips depending on my mood that night.

3:36 PM


Anonymous said...
Sorry about all the bad grammer in that last message.

3:39 PM


Anonymous said...
I guess this guys is doing something right to evoke these extreme responses. My opinion is that
it seems to go against some kind of unspoken code for another musician in the "scene" to take the role of critic and come down on other bands publicly. Especially bands like mine(FREER, jeremy) that struggle to survive. Not that he should feel sorry for us. Thats the way it goes. Life is hard. But it makes sense coming from someone who has never had to stuggle and make any major sacrifices for his music and who's position in his present band came from his relationship with famous people. Which is no insult to the famous people. It just seems that he would be a more of a gracious person. And not some strange combination of a pretentious, close minded underground elitist and shameless ass-kisser. I also noticed comments left about people hiding behind there computers. Which is funny because that is esentially what this guy Ben is doing. Just because he writes his name doesn't mean he isn't hiding. If it was his paid job to be a critic in a paper and such then so be it. But like a said he is a fellow "musician" in the local scene and that changes it from opinion to something personal. I'm know Matt Smith. We aren't close or anything but he is one of the nicest people I've met this city and a true music lover. So for that I will say if I ever see you face to face my dear little Ben. I will spit in your face. Or kiss you on the lips depending on my mood that night.

3:36 PM

6:16 PM


seer said...
none of the three previous posts changes the fact that freer really does blow. if i were that freer dude, i'd spend more time working on my "craft" rather than replying to what some dickhead wrote about me on some blog.

6:43 PM


Anonymous said...
There aren't as many good bands in Detroit as Deadtroiters would like to convince themself of. Bands like the Dirtbombs are the epitome of boring, watered down song writing. Do they even write their own songs? Well, that could be debated. We know for sure that John Gillis' fat nephew doesn't write any of them. Why dont you play some shows as a songwriter Big Ben? Not a writer? well, we all knew that--but the day shall come when this town wakes from it's Garage Rock hangover. Let's face it, Kid Rock and Eminem are the real reason Jack White got so much industry attention. He owes a lot to those fucktards. This Ben fag is a known Ass Pirate, so nobody should take his flabby words of bitterness too seriously.
I mean, parasites are always wishing they were the host.

Sincerely--who gives a fuck about this puke stain?

2:05 PM


Anonymous said...
Wow, Ben, you really made some great friends here. Apparently, you are not allowed to voice your opinions without getting spit on. New world order...

I just want to say thanks for the kind words; I appreciate it.

Sincerely,

Sir Isaac Martin Morris, Junior

PS--You're Ben Swank's nephew?

1:35 AM


Anonymous said...
PPS--Since this line was left anonymously ("parasites are always wishing they were the host"), does this make it public domain? I'm going to to use it and take all the credit. Take that, anonymous! Serves you right for writing your diatribe while hiding in your cubicle.

XOXO,

IMM, JR

1:43 AM


Anonymous said...
"Sincerely--who gives a fuck about this puke stain?"

I dunno, maybe the couple of dozen bands who enjoy the company of Ben enough to release material on Cass? Bands who don't react to a simple critique so violently as to become a small host of internet tough guys

also, +1 Anonymous

6:34 PM


Anonymous said...
And all of those bands are very talanted original and full of passion.

2:52 AM


Anonymous said...
"Serves you right for writing your diatribe while hiding in your cubicle?"

Great point, but you give him too much credit. Anyone who pens a sentence as doltish as "He owes a lot to those fucktards", could only aspire to cubicle work.

3:22 PM


Anonymous said...
hahaha you turds need to spend more time outside.

3:53 PM


Anonymous said...
So this is why Jack left Detroit.

11:17 PM


Anonymous said...
haha the guy who wrote haha you turds need to spend more time outside needs to spend more time outside.

12:57 AM


Anonymous said...
First!!!!

10:35 AM


Anonymous said...
I think it's funny that the people who are insulting the people who anonymously leave comments are anonymously leaving comments to do it. As far as I can see nobody has revealed thenselves except the FREER guy.

sincerely,
Anony

2:53 PM


Anonymous said...
52 CommentsClose this window Jump to comment form
Jasper said...
lulz

5:15 PM


Anonymous said...
You are such a pompous ass.

10:43 PM


Anonymous said...
matt smith needs his own blog.

1:56 PM


Anonymous said...
i heart lafayette 4evrz

5:02 PM


Anonymous said...
You dumb fuck. I played guitar on half the set.

7:22 PM


Anonymous said...
"Didn't the singer used to be in some Indigo Girls folk act?"

Sister Seed.

10:10 PM


Alex said...
"The bouncer was rightly fired on the spot and the higher-ups at the club planned an upcoming meeting on how to deal with punk rock situations."


wah wah.

1:04 AM


Elizabeth said...
This weekend was fun, but the Magic Stick not letting people under 21 go up and down from the Stick to the Garden Bowl was garbage.

So were the new bouncers.

8:58 PM


Anonymous said...
Fuck the Mahonies, Fuck The Terrible Twos, Fuck The Nice Device, Fuck Freer and Fuck the Dirtbombs, and fuck you! I own a Four Tops record!

11:44 PM


Anonymous said...
The only difference between you and an MTV V.J. is that you probably don't get laid.

11:46 PM


Elwood D. Pennypacker said...
Nothing but good vibes in New York for CMJ right? right? Good vibes, good times, peace in the middle east...right?

2:53 AM


Anonymous said...
gward yall

1:32 PM


Anonymous said...
I did not realize hot dogs were such a polarizing subject up there.

3:16 PM


Anonymous said...
Is it true that your Jack White's nephew and that you'r not the Dirtboms real drummer you just fill in from time to time?

9:05 PM


Anonymous said...
Hi Jack White's nephew. Cool Blog Jack White's Nephew.

2:04 AM


Anonymous said...
How is Jack White Jack White's nephew. How does his ass taste?

2:05 AM


Anonymous said...
Nobody's listening to you. Just because you have a place to publish your internal ramblings in true blog narcissism fashion, doesn't mean anybody gives a fuck what you think. Do you keep your list of probably shitty bands next to your list of reasons why you're an impotent wanker who has nothing better to do but cry out in the forest where nobody can or wants to hear? Critics are the best because they're usually washed up hack "musicians" who have an ax to grind with anyone that's actually having success and writing music that anybody actually gives a fuck about. So fuck off, go play minor chords on a toy piano in your closet with your clown suit on and then cry while you masturbate to a picture of Jack White's balls...

1:19 PM


a nony mouse said...
so if no one care's what's written here...why does everyone have such vicious comments? lets see what all these "anonymouses" are writing on thier blogs

1:43 PM


Anonymous said...
Your Jack Whites nephew right?

3:00 PM


Anonymous said...
Your Jack White's nephew right?

3:01 PM


Anonymous said...
Are you related to Jack White?

3:02 PM


Anonymous said...
I think you should include in your blog the fact you are Jack White's nephew and that you are not The Dirtbombs main drummer.

3:03 PM


duder said...
his is the dirtbombs main drummer (1 of 2) and has been for years, im guessing anonymous is in one the bands his critiqued. Better get used to it man, some people arent gonna like you sometimes. And sometimes there gonna write about it. Dont lose sleep over it babe.

5:03 PM


Jack White said...
hold me, ben. i'm lonely tonight.

III

10:55 PM


Anonymous said...
fucking a. you child. you headstrong child of a man. your future is blogging and not playing music.

3:15 AM


Anonymous said...
I think violence would be the best solution.

3:57 AM


Anonymous said...
Hey Ben! So you've never seen Ghost City or Headband? You gotta check them out, they are both fantastic(!), and at times hilarious. In fact, I'm DJing at the Ghost City CD Release Party tonight at Cliff Bell's, you should check it out. Too bad you didn't like Freer - but why so harsh? This goes without saying, but as a music journalist you know that just because you don't like something doesn't mean it's bad music. I mean, I wouldn't put the Muldoons' music on my iPod, but I wouldn't call them "shitty" just because I wasn't into it. I'm not trying to stir any shit-pots, I was just...well, surprised. I guess if the purpose of your blog is just to talk shit and not to actually comment on what's really going in the Detroit music scene, then it's fair. If not, well, then I'm just confused. Intersting read anyway. Hope to see you around soon (tonight!).

Melody

PS - it would be typed: *yawn*

11:31 AM


Anonymous said...
Dear Ben,
I heard there's a little crevice in the back of the gold dollar. If you pry off a few boards you can break in . Then find a nice damp spot in a corner and wank off in memory of your preteen days and bands you had no part in. Are you related to Jack White?

I love you.

Coleman A. Young

2:32 PM


swank said...
ben, you make me miss detroit more than anything. i love you buddy.

1:34 PM


Animus said...
a nony mouse said...
so if no one care's what's written here...why does everyone have such vicious comments? lets see what all these "anonymouses" are writing on thier blogs

Gee you don't think it's because they really care, do you? They know just about everyone and their nephew has more going on than they do and it pisses them off to no end.

5:09 PM


BlackJack- said...
the pen truely is mightier than the sword- seems some y'all need to chill out and stop hiding behind your computers, cowards.

6:19 PM


Anonymous said...
"I mean, I wouldn't put the Muldoons' music on my iPod, but I wouldn't call them "shitty" just because I wasn't into it."

I'll bite the bullet and call them shitty. But they're still too good for Cass Records...and are thus putting out TWO singles elsewhere.

10:15 PM


Anonymous said...
Cum shots in your mothers mouth

2:50 AM


Anonymous said...
I like piss.

2:55 AM


Anonymous said...
Nice Dave Eggars Swipe! +anonymous!!!

11:25 PM


Anonymous said...
does Ben being Jack White's nephew make your band suck any less? probably not.

4:06 PM


Kim H. said...
I agree about Freer, I saw them earlier this year, I think they were opening for The Go at the Blind Pig or something. I suppose it's not saying much that I can't remember where and it was less than a year ago.
The Go is the best band anywhere right now. Period.

10:53 AM


Anonymous said...
Wow, this an interesting dialogue thats taking place. I guess this guys is doing something right to evoke these extreme responses. My opinion is that
it seems to go against some kind of unspoken code for another musician in the "scene" to take the role of critic and come down on other bands publicly. Especially bands like mine(FREER, jeremy) that struggle to survive. Not that he should feel sorry for us. Thats the way it goes. Life is hard. But it makes sense coming from someone who has never had to stuggle and make any major sacrifices for his music and who's position in his present band came from his relationship with famous people. Which is no insult to the famous people. It just seems that he would be a more of a gracious person. And not some strange combination of a pretentious, close minded underground elitist and shameless asskisser. I also noticed comments left about people hiding behind there computers. Which is funny because that is esentially what this guy Ben is doing. Just because he writes his name soesn't mean he isn't hiding. If it was his paid job to be a critic in a paper and such then so be it. But like a said he is a fellow "musician" in the local scene and that changes it from opinion to something personal. I'm know Matt Smith. We aren't close or anything but he is one of the nicest people I've met this city and a true music lover. So for that I will say if I ever see you face to face my deart little Ben. I will spit in your face. Or kiss you on the lips depending on my mood that night.

3:36 PM


Anonymous said...
Sorry about all the bad grammer in that last message.

3:39 PM


Anonymous said...
I guess this guys is doing something right to evoke these extreme responses. My opinion is that
it seems to go against some kind of unspoken code for another musician in the "scene" to take the role of critic and come down on other bands publicly. Especially bands like mine(FREER, jeremy) that struggle to survive. Not that he should feel sorry for us. Thats the way it goes. Life is hard. But it makes sense coming from someone who has never had to stuggle and make any major sacrifices for his music and who's position in his present band came from his relationship with famous people. Which is no insult to the famous people. It just seems that he would be a more of a gracious person. And not some strange combination of a pretentious, close minded underground elitist and shameless ass-kisser. I also noticed comments left about people hiding behind there computers. Which is funny because that is esentially what this guy Ben is doing. Just because he writes his name doesn't mean he isn't hiding. If it was his paid job to be a critic in a paper and such then so be it. But like a said he is a fellow "musician" in the local scene and that changes it from opinion to something personal. I'm know Matt Smith. We aren't close or anything but he is one of the nicest people I've met this city and a true music lover. So for that I will say if I ever see you face to face my dear little Ben. I will spit in your face. Or kiss you on the lips depending on my mood that night.

3:36 PM

6:16 PM


seer said...
none of the three previous posts changes the fact that freer really does blow. if i were that freer dude, i'd spend more time working on my "craft" rather than replying to what some dickhead wrote about me on some blog.

6:43 PM


Anonymous said...
There aren't as many good bands in Detroit as Deadtroiters would like to convince themself of. Bands like the Dirtbombs are the epitome of boring, watered down song writing. Do they even write their own songs? Well, that could be debated. We know for sure that John Gillis' fat nephew doesn't write any of them. Why dont you play some shows as a songwriter Big Ben? Not a writer? well, we all knew that--but the day shall come when this town wakes from it's Garage Rock hangover. Let's face it, Kid Rock and Eminem are the real reason Jack White got so much industry attention. He owes a lot to those fucktards. This Ben fag is a known Ass Pirate, so nobody should take his flabby words of bitterness too seriously.
I mean, parasites are always wishing they were the host.

Sincerely--who gives a fuck about this puke stain?

2:05 PM


Anonymous said...
Wow, Ben, you really made some great friends here. Apparently, you are not allowed to voice your opinions without getting spit on. New world order...

I just want to say thanks for the kind words; I appreciate it.

Sincerely,

Sir Isaac Martin Morris, Junior

PS--You're Ben Swank's nephew?

1:35 AM


Anonymous said...
PPS--Since this line was left anonymously ("parasites are always wishing they were the host"), does this make it public domain? I'm going to to use it and take all the credit. Take that, anonymous! Serves you right for writing your diatribe while hiding in your cubicle.

XOXO,

Anonymous said...

Not too long ago I helped some valued friends work on a book about the history of band t-shirts. The whole process excited me and I learned a lot on the way. For example, each t-shirt featured in the book needed to be cleared by the band/their management before being used. Now my legal training is relegated mainly to weaseling out of parking tickets, but common sense would've led me to believe that an image a band has licensed to be manufactured on wearables should be fair game for publishables. And it could quite possibly be that way and the folks over at Simon and Schuster were just being cautious.

Either way, I still think it's pretty cool that David Byrne gave permission for them to use a bootleg Talking Heads t-shirt design. And it's lame that Grandmaster Flash wouldn't let them use his awesome '81 tour t-shirt complete with Sugar Hill Records logo printed on the reverse.

My main duties for the book involved interviewing rock stars and rounding up a variety of shirts for possible inclusion in the book. Included are such personal jams of mine like a baseball-style 3/4 length red sleeve from the first run of White Stripes tees, a thrift-store salvaged Gories black cat (later edition, printed after the screen for the white trim around the letters broke), a Jonathan Fire Eater monstrosity complete with band-supplied blood stains bleached-out, a couple of Sonic Youth prints and some more I'm forgetting.

Personally, my only problem with The Art of the Band T-shirt is the six pages dedicated to Blood on the Wall t-shirts that are, at best, faintly memorable. Otherwise, this portable tome rates head and shoulders above the trashy, fashion photo'd Johan Kugelberg curated Vintage Rock Tees (available at shitty Urban Outfitters near you) or the laughable dribble of Rock Tease. Both the latter books focus primarily on the 70's and 80's era of rock and roll t-shirts whereas The Art of the Band T-shirt has no set cut-off date for band inclusion. Conversely, The Art of the Band T-shirt provides way more historical background and storyline with each piece mentioned whereas the other two toilet rolls, more often than not, just give you a picture of a t-shirt lacking any relevant context or story.

Hilariously though, all three books include the Jamie Reid designed, promo-only Sex Pistols Never Mind the Bollocks... shirt printed inside out with both the front and back cover of the LP depicted on the front and back of this shirt. Granted, the shirt is BADASS and supposedly the print resembles properties more similar to a latex applique as opposed to standard t-shirt ink. But badass enough to warrant inclusion in all three books?

Plus, the other two books are particularly white. Mainly old shirts of boring old white musicians. The Art... features such United Colors of Benetton diversity as 95 South, Public Enemy, James Brown, the Boredoms, Afrika Bambaataa, Run DMC, Rick James, Martha and the Vandellas, MF Doom, etc. This book feels more American than either of the other two. And in turn, American is always better.

So I hereby give my full support behind The Art of the Band T-shirt and urge all twelve of you faithful readers to up and purchase a copy. To spur the possible purchasing, I am offering two (2) copies here as a giveaway. Whoever emails me or posts a comment here with the best/funniest/most amazing t-shirt find/story/dream/whatever will soon become the proud owner of a copy of The Art of the Band T-shirt (I really prefer the comments, you know, just in case you want to win). Also, positive comments on the Amazon Reviews page for this book will possibly be taken into consideration for extra credit.

Feel free to answer the standard t-shirt questionnaire I used on all the stars and post it in the comments.

What was your first rock band t-shirt?
What was/is your favorite rock band t-shirt

Anonymous said...

PM

Anonymous said...

Leave your comment

Anonymous said...

Jasper

So either TV On The Radio played St. Andrews Hall last night as a super-secret, impossible to have happened show…or the Metro Times gave you a heads up for a show that happened exactly one year ago. Check out page 45. I think there should be an “06″ after that “10/10″ date. Granted, I was not there last night so maybe it did happen…but I’ve got a feeling there’s an intern somewhere who doesn’t know how to read a calander.

And while I’m sort of on the subject, why do I have to wait until the Metro Times comes out to know who the supporting acts are for shows at the Magic Stick? The booking team there is making some outstanding pairings: VHS or Beta with Jason & The Hounds Below and Deastro. Malajube with Zoos of Berlin. Melt Banana with Carjack and Terrible Twos. This is important information. In fact, I’d have blown off the VHS or Beta show but now that Deastro and J&THB are on the bill, it’s a must-see. Hell, I’ll do the updating for the site myself if I’m paid in guest-list spots and drink tickets.

And while I’m thinking about J&THB. Does everyone know the new Von Bondies album is done? As well as the new Hentchmen, Dirtbombs, SSM and Pas/Cal. What’s everyone waiting for? You guys better release this stuff…before I do. I’m kidding, I don’t really have copies and I would never do that. But seriously, they’re sitting right here next to my laptop. No they’re not. Maybe.

So what percentage of yesterday’s yousendit megaupload rapidshare putfile links do you think were the Radiohead “Rainblows” album. When I got to work there was already a copy on my desk and four links in my Inbox…which makes me wonder why anyone was willing to pay for it, but whatever — you’re getting sick of my shitty shitty industry analysis. And retarded punctuation. I listened to it last night. It’s a solid album. There’s two or three songs that I really like and the rest sound exactly like I thought they would. I’d go on, but what’s the point? If you’re a Radiohead-head, you loved it before you heard it. If you were turned off by their electro-wankery years ago, you hated it without hearing it. And if you’re like me who’s been desperately trying to find something as exciting as “Strawberry Jam” since July, you’re once again out of luck. I’m begining to think Animal Collective may have ruined music for me.

Posted in Music | 7 Comments

Anonymous said...

LIVE PICS: THE MULDOONSOctober 8, 2007 | 2:00 pm
M.O.C.A.D. (MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART DETROIT) - DETROIT, MI - 10/5/07

Anonymous said...

LIVE PICS: THE MULDOONSOctober 8, 2007 | 2:00 pm
M.O.C.A.D. (MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART DETROIT) - DETROIT, MI - 10/5/07

Anonymous said...

LIVE PICS: THE MULDOONSOctober 8, 2007 | 2:00 pm
M.O.C.A.D. (MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART DETROIT) - DETROIT, MI - 10/5/07

Anonymous said...

Brooklyn Vegan
DataWhat?
Detour
Five-Three Dialtone
Handmade Detroit
I'dDream
Irony Is Gay
It Came From Culture City
Just Haircuts and Jackets
Keith Hair Day
More Info Than Brains
Motor City Rocks
Music Blahg
My Old Kentucky Blog
Pants Are Optional
Record Reviews
Riff2
Robots vs Dragons
Semi-Live
Stereogum
Theft Liable To Prosecution
These People
The Sorry Wolf Club
Thighs Wide Shut
Tiny Mix Tapes

Anonymous said...

We are the lawyers for Last Gang Records Inc.
Certain audiovisual recordings containing the performances of the musical group professionally known as “Metric” are made available on the Web Vomit website in violation of exclusive rights held by Last Gang Records Inc. These recordings can be found via the following link: http://jasper.webvomit.com/?p=1318.
We request that you immediately disable access to and remove this copyrighted content. Should you require further information regarding this matter, please contact me at [internet police world headquarters, blah, blah, blah…]

Anonymous said...

We are the lawyers for Last Gang Records Inc.
Certain audiovisual recordings containing the performances of the musical group professionally known as “Metric” are made available on the Web Vomit website in violation of exclusive rights held by Last Gang Records Inc. These recordings can be found via the following link: http://jasper.webvomit.com/?p=1318.
We request that you immediately disable access to and remove this copyrighted content. Should you require further information regarding this matter, please contact me at [internet police world headquarters, blah, blah, blah…]

We are the lawyers for Last Gang Records Inc.
Certain audiovisual recordings containing the performances of the musical group professionally known as “Metric” are made available on the Web Vomit website in violation of exclusive rights held by Last Gang Records Inc. These recordings can be found via the following link: http://jasper.webvomit.com/?p=1318.
We request that you immediately disable access to and remove this copyrighted content. Should you require further information regarding this matter, please contact me at [internet police world headquarters, blah, blah, blah…]
We are the lawyers for Last Gang Records Inc.
Certain audiovisual recordings containing the performances of the musical group professionally known as “Metric” are made available on the Web Vomit website in violation of exclusive rights held by Last Gang Records Inc. These recordings can be found via the following link: http://jasper.webvomit.com/?p=1318.
We request that you immediately disable access to and remove this copyrighted content. Should you require further information regarding this matter, please contact me at [internet police world headquarters, blah, blah, blah…]

Anonymous said...

"go play minor chords on a toy piano in your closet with your clown suit on and then cry while you masturbate to a picture of Jack White's balls..."

That is some funny shit there.

And all these assholes talking about hiding behind their computers and what not are retarded-- this is the fucking internet idiots.

Anonymous said...

There is a reason The Go have never gone anywhere. Because they are imitation artists; And they are not very interesting. I would venture to say turds that wont flush.

Anonymous said...

there is a reason the last comment is "anonymous" , because the commentor is in fact "anonymous" . leave the go alone . you wish you could flush the go's turds. leave ben alone . leave jack white alone . leave me alone . leave matt smith alone . start your own blog capatain "anonymous". signed anonymouse

Anonymous said...

I agree with the last Anonymous commentator commenting on the other anonymous commentators. All you anonymous commentator bullies should leave all the other anonymous commentatours alone. Especially the sweet, innocent Detroit garage rock elite. Hopefully the Metro Times writes another article to sooth their wounds. Oh wait, they all have good friends in the Metro Times! It's so nice to see that everything will stay the same in Detroit. FOREVER! Jack it's alright. We're all still kissing you're ass. Come back!!!!!!

m. said...

lolz. where'd this influx of dipshits come from?

hey, guys, i can do it too. watch. cum stain jack white the go ass kiss. now am i any more of a person than i was a second ago? no. am i better, scenier, more intelligent, whatever? no. are you? definitely not.

jesus h. christ on a bike!

Anonymous said...

Cool. I was just surfing and I ended up here, and it's been really entertaining. Thank you.

JW

Anonymous said...

Who knows where to download XRumer 5.0 Palladium?
Help, please. All recommend this program to effectively advertise on the Internet, this is the best program!