From a White Stripes Book Proposal That *Almost* Got Accepted...

Below is my just-missed-it proposal for Continuum's 33 1/3rd series. Out of 527 proposals, I made it to the final 27 and they ended up selecting only 10 titles. If anyone runs a publishing company and is looking to hand out a royalty advance, I'm listening.





No other band from the turn of the century has been more mythologized or misunderstood than the White Stripes. The red and white-clad duo from Detroit was thrust to the forefront of the nascent "garage rock" revival of 2001 with the likes of such bands as the Strokes, the Hives and the Vines. In the name of a "return to rock" the White Stripes right-place-at-the-right-time 3rd album White Blood Cells was critically acclaimed the world over and introduced the band to an overly receptive international audience that would only grow exponentially in the years to come.

The Michel Gondry Lego-fied clip for "Fell in Love with a Girl", John Peel's exulting praise on the BBC and the subsequent blistering live sessions recorded at Maida Vale, the band's turning down of a cover shoot for almighty NME magazine (only to have a live shot used without their approval)…these are just a myriad of the well-tread, good copy stories that are frequently and without thought repeated ad nauseam in the telling of the tale explaining the success of White Blood Cells.

To that I say, you've not even scratched the surface.

What really gets me excited is that there's so much more about White Blood Cells that's never been told, never been dug up and exposed to the ripe air of peering eyes and inquisitive minds. Information (hardcore facts…pure provable FACTS) that only add a complex back-story to the narrative being told by the lyrics and melodies we're all familiar with. Stories about its creation (the band crashing on the couches and floor of a cluttered Memphis apartment during recording), the touring (a near-riot in Missoula, $15,000 cash locked in a hotel safe in LA with no way to retrieve it) and the drama (being kicked out of the actual Hotel Yorba by a hammer-wielding employee while trying to shoot a music video there) are all, whether you're familiar with the band or not, intriguing to the point of enjoyment regardless and unattached to one's opinions on the actual music.

I'm amazed no one ever brings up the fact that HALF the songs on this album originated in various musical outfits Jack White inhabited through the late-Nineties in Detroit, mutating and adapting with each different group that tackled them. Whether it was as a sideman in Two Star Tabernacle, a country-gospel-rock band (think the Gun Club meets Hank Williams' "Luke the Drifter") that debuted the album's first single "Hotel Yorba" and stellar "Now Mary" a good four years before they'd ever see release - OR - his very own take on Dylan with the Band (Jack White and the Bricks) that debuted "I Can't Wait" and "Offend in Every Way" in their brief, six-show existence in Detroit in the summer months of 1999.

And no one even seems to know that a song like "I Can Learn" had been performed at the White Stripes' first live performance in 1997 or that "Dead Leaves…" had been kicking around in their arsenal since 1998. In short, I hope to portray how White Blood Cells is the brilliant fusion of the musical detritus that'd been collecting in Jack White's brain for years equally coupled with his ever-expanding and expressive brand new compositions.

People gloss over the fact that such White Stripes touchstones as cover songs, guest musicians, blues music and guitar solos are all literally non-existent on this album. This may seem small, petty or insignificant, but when only one other White Stripes album is lacking only ONE of these components (Get Behind Me Satan has no covers), it makes it all the bit more peculiar and intriguing. White Blood Cells, while being most people's introduction to the band, is seemingly the least "White Stripes" White Stripes album.

And no one outside a small circle of those closest to the band are even aware of the absolute legal shit-storm that resulted with their record label, Sympathy for the Record Industry, upon the severe non-payment of royalties on sales for and the band's resultant leap to major labels XL and V2.

I've interviewed both Jack White solo (for an in-depth feature in Plan B magazine in 2003) and the band together (as part of an upcoming, feature-length documentary) as well as having penned the track-by-track liner-notes to their Under Blackpool Lights concert DVD. I have an established rapport with both band members that already has them committed to speak with me at great length about anything and everything in regards to White Blood Cells and the surrounding hysteria.

While band involvement is by no means anything unheard of in 33 1/3rd territory, let it be known that of the no less than seven books written about the White Stripes, neither Jack nor Meg have participated in any aspect of any of them. With their involvement it's painfully clear that this book will contain heretofore unimagined insight, musings and involvement the likes of which White Stripes fans (whether they be die-hard or casual) will salivate at the hope of. Conversely, even readers completely uninitiated to the band will simply be better informed because of it.

With their pledged participation, I've also been granted access into Jack White's personal archive of the band. From the daunting MOUNDS of press clippings (White Blood Cells was the first time the band would employ a publicist) from the era to unreleased live recordings, personal photographs and everything else imaginable, the availability of this trove will not only help to strengthen my own knowledge of the band, but it will help cut my time spent on research considerably.

Of most supreme historical importance is hours upon hours of video footage shot of the band in-studio while recording White Blood Cells. While previously only rumored to exist, the availability of said tapes will open a virtually untapped portrait of the band…that is, how they operate, interact and get along in the ever-mystifying studio setting.

As if their help were not enough, I've established strong connections with many others involved in the making of this record. David Swanson (filmographer of the sessions), Patrick Pantano (album cover photographer) Jack Yarber and Nick Ray (friends who's floor the band crashed on while recording), Chloe Walsh (the band's publicist), Ian Montone (the band's lawyer and subsequent manager) John Baker (tour manager) and no less than fifteen others.

As it stands, White Blood Cells is a quirk in the band's catalog that is deserving of deeper critical analysis and exposure. While access to the trove of above-mentioned raw information to the band is crucial, the ability to synthesize and present that information without boring, confusing or pandering to the reader will be a paramount goal of the utmost importance. It is my intention to cut through the rampant mythology and misunderstanding of everything surrounding them and this record and simply portray what a truly outstanding piece of modern musical achievement it really is.

The best way to do so is to simply let this smattering of 16 seemingly disparate songs guide the story. Each song's genesis, whether it be in 1997 with Two Star Tabernacle, the White Stripes in 2001 or whatever, will be its starting point and it will all be chronologically pieced together with the main focus being each composition's studio completion. From there, due attention will be paid to the resultant touring, press mania, video shoots, legal wrangling and surrounding hubbub that helps complete the picture of how this album (and more so this band) truly connected to its audience.

I've been following the White Stripes since 1997 and have dedicated more time, energy and manpower hours to the band than any sane person should to ANY endeavor that doesn't result in marriage or birth.

I completed three years of journalism studies at Wayne State University before leaving to tour in the Dirtbombs. Because of my journalistic training, I tend to focus on facts, anecdotes, and first-hand quotes in my writing rather than observations, stream-of-consciousness, feelings or any of that other flowery hippie bunk that behooved Lester Bangs but has severely hampered any subsequent rock writers.

Since leaving college, I've had my writing featured in publications as varied as Ugly Things, SF Weekly, Plan B, NME, Chunklet, Creem Online, the Stranger and Careless Talk Costs Lives. I also won Rolling Stone magazine's 2003 college journalism award for a tour diary I wrote about the Dirtbombs' trip to South-By-Southwest that year.

The reason I think I'm most qualified to write a book about the White Stripes is that I've always intended on doing so. From the early days sneaking into dank Detroit bars, collecting set lists and photocopied flyers off the wall on school nights all the way through worldwide tours, platinum records and TV appearances, I've stood by. Studiously keeping my own archive and mentally filing away every last bit of informational flotsam and jetsam, this band is my life.

The problem is…I've never known quite how to best frame my own personal experiences with the band in terms of writing. It's always felt too massive or too complex for me to even begin to digest or tackle.

The possibility of a 33 1/3rd book was like a beacon from heaven. I don't need to worry about or focus on the band's early years or any tabloid fodder. That's a different story for a different time. The story that I can tell is that of a band caught right on the precipice of decent indie rock notoriety teetering onto outright worldwide recognition…roughly, from the time of recording White Blood Cells in February 2001 until touring of the record ceased in October of 2002, with two triumphant gigs opening for the Rolling Stones and a performance on Saturday Night Live.

I think most famous artists will agree that the most exciting period of their careers was that precipice…when things just started to pick-up, where each day held a fresh, new and usually surreal experience that, after awhile, could (or would) easily become rote and commonplace. And that is why although I think Icky Thump is their best record, Elephant the fan-favorite and Get Behind Me Satan the most shrouded in mystery, White Blood Cells is the exciting record, the one most-deserving to be fleshed-out into a cohesive, well-informed book.

Return to Recent eBay Losses...

YOUNG SAVAGES GARAGE 45 ON DYNAMIC SOUNDS 2006! HEAR IT
Your max bid: $37.77
# of bids: 8
Ending price: $38.77

Never underestimate the power of a soundclip in an auction. I've put so many uninspired, runner-up bids on rerun45's auctions after hearing soundclips that I feel like he owes me money. No regrets on losing this one.


Garage - The Driving Stupid -"Horror Asparagus Stories"
Your max bid: $67.77
# of bids: 33
Ending price: $67.97

Hipped to this by the Horrors fanzine of the same name. How it never made it to a Back from the Grave comp I'll never know. And this was just for the one-sided promo version? Serial eBay overpricer craigmoerer has the stock issue available as a $175 Buy-It-Now which is absurd, although I still desperately want this gem.


1960s Garage 45 ASCOTS Who Will It Be? FRAT B.F.T.G.
(Reserve Not Met)
Your max bid: $466.66
# of bids: 6
Ending price: $360.00

Next to Lee Marvin Computer Arm, the only other respectable thing to ever come out of Waterford, Michigan is the Ascots. Perpetually available in Barry Wickham's mail auctions for the convenient price of $998, the quantity find of mint, unplayed copies has killed the value of this record. I was hoping to cash in and my max for this VG++ copy was more than $100 over what anyone else wanted to pay for it. Emailed and asked what his reserve was and if he wanted to sell outside of eBay. No response.


Woven Bones Hozac Hookup Club Black Lips Blank Dogs
Your max bid: $8.87
# of bids: 13
Ending price: $51.00

I'd heard a track on their Myspace that I dug and thought I might be able to get this easy. I was wrong. Is this absurd for a record that was just released this year? For a band that's not even that well-known?


Idle Times Hozac Hookup Club Black Lips Blank Dogs
Your max bid: $7.77
# of bids: 10
Ending price: $26.00

I clearly should have joined the Hozac Hookup Club when I had the chance. Not one to sleep on singles club invites, when Hozac sent the list of upcoming artists for this, I recognized not one that I had to have. In the interim, I've found out about 3 (so far) that I'm bummed I didn't jump on.


Dutchess and Duke Hozac Gold 69/150 Tyvek Black Lips
Your max bid: $29.99
# of bids: 10
Ending price: $30.00

Got screwed out of a gold version of this because I'd failed to include what record I wanted with my paypal payment to Hozac. Even more reason for the standardization of Paypal shopping carts the internet over. I'm totally smitten with this band and otherwise would feel no compunction in paying this much just for color vinyl and derivative artwork.


CLIX RECORDS STORY 31-cut CD Michigan rockabilly label
Your max bid: $13.33
# of bids: 3
Ending price: $13.83

A rockabilly label from Troy, Michigan? Sure, I'll bite. Got a copy for my bid price when the seller relisted. Have yet to listen to. Artwork is shoddy and liner notes nil. A bootleg.


A NUMBER OF NAMES Skitso/Sharevari QUALITY/RFC 12"
Your max bid: $33.33
# of bids: 11
Ending price: $52.00

The only place to find A Number of Names classic "Skitso" is on the Canadian release of their seminal "Sharevari" single. I'd plunked down a C-note on an original Capriccio 12" in post-fire retail therapy but am now terribly anxious to actually hear what I believe to be their only other song.


MAJESTICS Class A ULTRA RARE DISCO/FUNK/RAP 45 mp3
Your max bid: $111.11
# of bids: 13
Ending price: $393.00

Bid because I was erroneously told it was a Detroit record. Turned out to be from Milwaukee and my interest plummetted. A peculiar record in that it's sought after by modern soul collectors for the A-side and early rap collectors for it's B-side.


BLUE HAZE W/BIG Z KILLER MICHIGAN GARAGE INSTRO 45!
Your max bid: $44.44
# of bids: 6
Ending price: $77.88

Another case of rerun45 enchanting me with Michigan 7"s with soundclips. I've probably spent more money with this seller (through both eBay and record fairs) than any other in my life. He consistently turns up great shit and I've been known to pay top dollar for...uh, shit?


BMW - ROCK THE HOUSE DETROIT BLUE ROSE RAP 12" HEAR
Your max bid: $202.22
# of bids: 8
Ending price: $204.72

Have you noticed how often I'm the second highest bidder in these auctions? Too often. It's way better to lose by a mile than by a hair. I guess now I can let the cat out of the bag and say that I think the Blue Rose label is the genesis of the rap scene in Detroit. I was hoping I was the only one hip to this stuff, but obviously there's people as equally enamored as I am. Bid on this was overcompensating for losing the 12" below.


BMW - CHILLIN DETROIT RAP ON BLUE ROSE RARE 12" HEAR
Your max bid: $333.33
# of bids: 11
Ending price: $338.33

Both of these BMW 12"s were sold by a record store in Detroit that I frequent and frequently ask them to hit me up if Blue Rose/weird Detroit rap comes in. They put them up on eBay. I can't say that I'm mad, they clearly got a buttload of dough for them. But I can point to this as a reason that record stores are dying. No, it's not putting records for auction online (that's one of the few lifebloods still flowing). It's lack of connection with customers. Had the seller contacted me (and yes, they have my info) and asked for $500 for both of these 12"s, I most likely would have taken that offer. And granted, it brings into the equation all kinds of unpredictable variables that can only really be determined once the record is listed (or as the seller said to me "rolling the dice"). Here the human-to-human interaction level is removed and the possibility of finding sweet-ass records at physical stores diminishes, to the point where I will soon not bother going into their storefront and instead merely peruse their auction list. While this is great for the worldwide record collectorate, it does not endear yourself to hometown customers. All that being said, I'm still aching copies for these two BMW 12"s and the Breeze 7" on Blue Rose. Will pay or trade handsomely. Please.


MUDHONEY Street Waves 7" '08 RARE #13/79 SUB POP Punk
Your max bid: $33.33
# of bids: 12
Ending price: $129.50

One of the few bands who I have damn-near everything they've ever done on vinyl. The sleeve enticed me and I thought I'd get it cheap, but I underestimated the dormant Mud collectors out there. I don't even think I've got the non-sleeve version of this 7". I'm slacking in my old age.